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It
was
like
when
I
had
to
take
Mabel
out
in
her
chair
.
I
could
always
find
a
dozen
reasons
to
put
it
off
.
You
ought
to
be
grateful
you
have
legs
to
push
,
Aunt
Annie
used
to
say
(
they
knew
I
didn
t
like
being
seen
out
pushing
the
chair
)
.
But
it
s
in
my
character
,
it
s
how
I
was
made
.
I
can
t
help
it
.
Time
passed
,
it
must
have
been
midnight
or
more
and
I
went
up
to
see
how
she
was
,
to
see
if
she
d
drink
a
cup
of
tea
,
and
I
couldn
t
get
her
to
answer
me
,
she
was
breathing
faster
than
ever
,
it
was
terrifying
the
way
she
panted
,
she
seemed
to
catch
at
the
air
as
if
she
could
never
get
it
fast
enough
.
I
shook
her
but
she
seemed
asleep
although
her
eyes
were
open
,
her
face
was
very
livid
and
she
seemed
to
be
staring
at
something
on
the
ceiling
.
Well
I
felt
really
frightened
,
I
thought
,
I
ll
give
her
half
an
hour
and
then
I
must
go
.
I
sat
by
her
,
I
could
see
that
things
were
definitely
worse
by
the
way
she
was
sweating
and
her
face
was
terrible
.
Another
thing
she
did
those
days
was
picking
at
the
sheets
.
Pimples
had
spread
all
over
both
corners
of
her
mouth
and
lips
.
Well
at
last
having
locked
her
door
in
case
,
I
set
off
again
to
Lewes
,
I
remember
I
got
there
just
after
1
:
30
,
everything
shut
up
,
of
course
.
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I
went
straight
to
the
street
where
the
doctor
lived
and
stopped
a
bit
short
of
his
house
.
I
was
just
sitting
there
in
the
dark
getting
ready
to
go
and
ring
the
bell
,
getting
my
story
straight
and
so
on
,
when
there
was
a
tapping
on
the
window
.
It
was
a
policeman
.
It
was
a
very
nasty
shock
.
I
lowered
the
window
.
Just
wondered
what
you
were
doing
here
,
he
said
.
Don
t
tell
me
it
s
no
parking
.
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Depends
what
your
business
is
,
he
said
.
He
had
a
look
at
my
licence
,
and
wrote
down
my
number
,
very
deliberate
.
He
was
an
old
man
,
he
can
t
have
been
any
good
or
he
wouldn
t
have
been
a
constable
still
.
Well
,
he
said
,
do
you
live
here
?
No
,
I
said
.