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- Даниэл Киз
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- Цветы для Элджернона
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That
was
what
she
was
doing
to
me
,
and
I
couldn
’
t
stand
it
.
When
she
went
to
the
bedroom
and
cried
I
felt
bad
about
it
and
I
told
her
it
was
all
my
fault
.
I
don
’
t
deserve
someone
as
good
as
her
.
Why
can
’
t
I
control
myself
just
enough
to
keep
on
loving
her
?
Just
enough
.
October
19
Motor
activity
impaired
.
I
keep
tripping
and
dropping
things
.
At
first
I
didn
’
t
think
it
was
me
.
I
thought
she
was
changing
things
around
.
The
wastebasket
was
in
my
way
,
and
so
were
the
chairs
,
and
I
thought
she
had
moved
them
.
Now
I
realize
my
coordination
is
bad
.
I
have
to
move
slowly
to
get
things
right
.
And
it
’
s
increasingly
difficult
to
type
.
Why
do
I
keep
blaming
Alice
?
And
why
doesn
’
t
she
argue
?
That
irritates
me
even
more
because
I
see
the
pity
in
her
face
.
My
only
pleasure
now
is
the
TV
set
.
I
spend
most
of
the
day
watching
the
quiz
programs
,
the
old
movies
,
the
soap
operas
,
and
even
the
kiddie
shows
and
cartoons
.
And
then
I
can
’
t
bring
myself
to
turn
it
off
.
Late
at
night
there
are
the
old
movies
,
the
horror
pictures
,
the
late
show
,
and
the
late
-
late
show
,
and
even
the
little
sermon
before
the
channel
signs
off
for
the
night
,
and
the
"
Star
-
Spangled
Banner
"
with
the
flag
waving
in
the
background
,
and
fi
nally
the
channel
test
pattern
that
stares
back
at
me
through
the
little
square
window
with
its
unclosing
eye
.
.
.
.
Why
am
I
always
looking
at
life
through
a
window
?
And
after
it
’
s
all
over
I
’
m
sick
with
myself
because
there
is
so
little
time
left
for
me
to
read
and
write
and
think
,
and
because
I
should
know
better
than
to
drug
my
mind
with
this
dishonest
stuff
that
’
s
aimed
at
the
child
in
me
.
Especially
me
,
because
the
child
in
me
is
reclaiming
my
mind
.
I
know
all
this
,
but
when
Alice
tells
me
I
shouldn
’
t
waste
my
time
,
I
get
angry
and
tell
her
to
leave
me
alone
.
