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- Марк Мэнсон
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- Тонкое искусство пофигизма
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- Стр. 94/115
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To
truly
appreciate
something
,
you
must
confine
yourself
to
it
.
There
’
s
a
certain
level
of
joy
and
meaning
that
you
reach
in
life
only
when
you
’
ve
spent
decades
investing
in
a
single
relationship
,
a
single
craft
,
a
single
career
.
And
you
cannot
achieve
those
decades
of
investment
without
rejecting
the
alternatives
.
The
act
of
choosing
a
value
for
yourself
requires
rejecting
alternative
values
.
If
I
choose
to
make
my
marriage
the
most
important
part
of
my
life
,
that
means
I
’
m
(
probably
)
choosing
not
to
make
cocaine
-
fueled
hooker
orgies
an
important
part
of
my
life
.
If
I
’
m
choosing
to
judge
myself
based
on
my
ability
to
have
open
and
accepting
friendships
,
that
means
I
’
m
rejecting
trashing
my
friends
behind
their
backs
.
These
are
all
healthy
decisions
,
yet
they
require
rejection
at
every
turn
.
The
point
is
this
:
we
all
must
give
a
fuck
about
something
,
in
order
to
value
something
.
And
to
value
something
,
we
must
reject
what
is
not
that
something
.
To
value
X
,
we
must
reject
non
-
X
.
That
rejection
is
an
inherent
and
necessary
part
of
maintaining
our
values
,
and
therefore
our
identity
.
We
are
defined
by
what
we
choose
to
reject
.
And
if
we
reject
nothing
(
perhaps
in
fear
of
being
rejected
by
something
ourselves
)
,
we
essentially
have
no
identity
at
all
.
The
desire
to
avoid
rejection
at
all
costs
,
to
avoid
confrontation
and
conflict
,
the
desire
to
attempt
to
accept
everything
equally
and
to
make
everything
cohere
and
harmonize
,
is
a
deep
and
subtle
form
of
entitlement
.
Entitled
people
,
because
they
feel
as
though
they
deserve
to
feel
great
all
the
time
,
avoid
rejecting
anything
because
doing
so
might
make
them
or
someone
else
feel
bad
.
And
because
they
refuse
to
reject
anything
,
they
live
a
valueless
,
pleasure
-
driven
,
and
self
-
absorbed
life
.
All
they
give
a
fuck
about
is
sustaining
the
high
a
little
bit
longer
,
to
avoid
the
inevitable
failures
of
their
life
,
to
pretend
the
suffering
away
.
Rejection
is
an
important
and
crucial
life
skill
.
Nobody
wants
to
be
stuck
in
a
relationship
that
isn
’
t
making
them
happy
.
Nobody
wants
to
be
stuck
in
a
business
doing
work
they
hate
and
don
’
t
believe
in
.
Nobody
wants
to
feel
that
they
can
’
t
say
what
they
really
mean
.
Yet
people
choose
these
things
.
All
the
time
.
Honesty
is
a
natural
human
craving
.
But
part
of
having
honesty
in
our
lives
is
becoming
comfortable
with
saying
and
hearing
the
word
“
no
.
”
In
this
way
,
rejection
actually
makes
our
relationships
better
and
our
emotional
lives
healthier
.
