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- Марк Мэнсон
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- Тонкое искусство пофигизма
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- Стр. 87/115
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Or
the
college
guy
who
has
a
crush
on
his
tutor
.
So
he
agonizes
over
every
sign
,
every
laugh
,
every
smile
,
every
diversion
into
small
talk
,
and
emails
me
a
twenty
-
eight
-
page
novella
that
concludes
with
the
question
,
“
How
do
I
ask
her
out
?
”
Or
the
single
mother
whose
now
-
adult
kids
have
finished
school
and
are
loafing
around
on
her
couch
,
eating
her
food
,
spending
her
money
,
not
respecting
her
space
or
her
desire
for
privacy
.
She
wants
them
to
move
on
with
their
lives
.
She
wants
to
move
on
with
her
life
.
Yet
she
’
s
scared
to
death
of
pushing
her
children
away
,
scared
to
the
point
of
asking
,
“
How
do
I
ask
them
to
move
out
?
”
These
are
VCR
questions
.
From
the
outside
,
the
answer
is
simple
:
just
shut
up
and
do
it
.
But
from
the
inside
,
from
the
perspective
of
each
of
these
people
,
these
questions
feel
impossibly
complex
and
opaque
—
existential
riddles
wrapped
in
enigmas
packed
in
a
KFC
bucket
full
of
Rubik
’
s
Cubes
.
VCR
questions
are
funny
because
the
answer
appears
difficult
to
anyone
who
has
them
and
appears
easy
to
anyone
who
does
not
.
The
problem
here
is
pain
.
Filling
out
the
appropriate
paperwork
to
drop
out
of
med
school
is
a
straightforward
and
obvious
action
;
breaking
your
parents
’
hearts
is
not
.
Asking
a
tutor
out
on
a
date
is
as
simple
as
saying
the
words
;
risking
intense
embarrassment
and
rejection
feels
far
more
complicated
.
Asking
someone
to
move
out
of
your
house
is
a
clear
decision
;
feeling
as
if
you
’
re
abandoning
your
own
children
is
not
.
I
struggled
with
social
anxiety
throughout
much
of
my
adolescence
and
young
adult
life
.
I
spent
most
of
my
days
distracting
myself
with
video
games
and
most
of
my
nights
either
drinking
or
smoking
away
my
uneasiness
.
For
many
years
,
the
thought
of
speaking
to
a
stranger
—
especially
if
that
stranger
happened
to
be
particularly
attractive
/
interesting
/
popular
/
smart
—
felt
impossible
to
me
.
I
walked
around
in
a
daze
for
years
,
asking
myself
dumb
VCR
questions
:
“
How
?
How
do
you
just
walk
up
and
talk
to
a
person
?
How
can
somebody
do
that
?
”
I
had
all
sorts
of
screwed
-
up
beliefs
about
this
,
like
that
you
weren
’
t
allowed
to
speak
to
someone
unless
you
had
some
practical
reason
to
,
or
that
women
would
think
I
was
a
creepy
rapist
if
I
so
much
as
said
,
“
Hello
.
”
The
problem
was
that
my
emotions
defined
my
reality
.
Because
it
felt
like
people
didn
’
t
want
to
talk
to
me
,
I
came
to
believe
that
people
didn
’
t
want
to
talk
to
me
.
And
thus
,
my
VCR
question
:
“
How
do
you
just
walk
up
and
talk
to
a
person
?
”
