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I
know
that
makes
me
a
bit
of
a
hypocrite
.
If
that
’
s
the
case
,
shouldn
’
t
I
stay
?
Soldier
through
it
?
Maybe
if
I
’
d
had
some
practice
,
maybe
if
I
’
d
had
more
devastation
in
my
life
,
I
would
be
more
prepared
to
go
on
.
It
’
s
not
that
my
life
has
been
perfect
.
I
’
ve
had
disappointments
and
I
’
ve
been
lonely
and
frustrated
and
angry
and
all
the
crappy
stuff
everyone
feels
.
But
in
terms
of
heartbreak
,
I
’
ve
been
spared
.
I
’
ve
never
toughened
up
enough
to
handle
what
I
’
d
have
to
handle
if
I
were
to
stay
.
Kim
is
now
telling
me
about
being
rescued
from
certain
incarceration
by
Willow
.
As
she
describes
how
Willow
took
charge
of
the
whole
hospital
,
there
is
such
admiration
in
her
voice
.
I
picture
Kim
and
Willow
becoming
friends
,
even
though
there
are
twenty
years
between
them
.
It
makes
me
happy
to
imagine
them
drinking
tea
or
going
to
the
movies
together
,
still
connected
to
each
other
by
the
invisible
chain
of
a
family
that
no
longer
exists
.
Now
Kim
is
listing
all
the
people
who
are
at
the
hospital
or
who
have
been
,
during
the
course
of
the
day
,
ticking
them
off
with
her
fingers
:
"
Your
grandparents
and
aunts
,
uncles
,
and
cousins
.
Adam
and
Brooke
Vega
and
the
various
rabble
-
rousers
who
came
with
her
.
Adam
’
s
bandmates
Mike
and
Fitzy
and
Liz
and
her
girlfriend
,
Sarah
,
all
of
whom
have
been
downstairs
in
the
waiting
room
since
they
got
heaved
out
of
the
ICU
.
Professor
Christie
,
who
drove
down
and
stayed
half
the
night
before
driving
back
so
she
could
sleep
a
few
hours
and
shower
and
make
some
morning
appointment
she
had
.
Henry
and
the
baby
,
who
are
on
their
way
over
right
now
because
the
baby
woke
up
at
five
in
the
morning
and
Henry
called
us
and
said
that
he
could
not
stay
at
home
any
longer
.
And
me
and
Mom
,
"
Kim
concludes
.
"
Shoot
.
I
lost
count
of
how
many
people
that
was
.
But
it
was
a
lot
.
And
more
have
called
and
asked
to
come
,
but
your
aunt
Diane
told
them
to
wait
.
She
says
that
we
’
re
making
enough
nuisance
of
ourselves
.
And
I
think
by
‘
us
,
’
she
means
me
and
Adam
.
"
Kim
stops
and
smiles
for
a
split
second
.
Then
she
makes
this
funny
noise
,
a
cross
between
a
cough
and
a
throat
-
clearing
.
I
’
ve
heard
her
make
this
sound
before
;
it
’
s
what
she
does
when
she
’
s
summoning
her
courage
,
getting
ready
to
jump
off
the
rocks
and
into
the
bracing
river
water
.
"
I
do
have
a
point
to
all
this
,
"
she
continues
.
"
There
are
like
twenty
people
in
that
waiting
room
right
now
.
Some
of
them
are
related
to
you
.
Some
of
them
are
not
.
But
we
’
re
all
your
family
.
"
She
stops
now
.
Leans
over
me
so
that
the
wisps
of
her
hair
tickle
my
face
.
She
kisses
me
on
the
forehead
.
"
You
still
have
a
family
,
"
she
whispers
.
Last
summer
,
we
hosted
an
accidental
Labor
Day
party
at
our
house
.
It
had
been
a
busy
season
.
Camp
for
me
.
Then
we
’
d
gone
to
Gran
’
s
family
’
s
Massachusetts
retreat
.
I
felt
like
I
had
barely
seen
Adam
and
Kim
all
summer
.
My
parents
were
lamenting
that
they
hadn
’
t
seen
Willow
and
Henry
and
the
baby
in
months
.
"
Henry
says
she
’
s
starting
to
walk
,
"
Dad
noted
that
morning
.
We
were
all
sitting
in
the
living
room
in
front
of
the
fan
,
trying
not
to
melt
.
Oregon
was
having
a
record
heat
wave
.
It
was
ten
in
the
morning
and
pushing
ninety
degrees
.
Mom
looked
up
at
the
calendar
.
"
She
’
s
ten
months
old
already
.
Where
has
the
time
gone
?
"
Then
she
looked
at
Teddy
and
me
.
"
How
is
it
humanly
possible
that
I
have
a
daughter
who
’
s
starting
her
senior
year
in
high
school
?
How
in
the
hell
can
my
baby
boy
be
starting
second
grade
?
"
"
I
’
m
not
a
baby
,
"
Teddy
shot
back
,
clearly
insulted
.
