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- Федор Достоевский
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"
In
the
evening
I
used
to
walk
to
the
waterfall
.
There
was
a
spot
there
which
was
quite
closed
in
and
hidden
from
view
by
large
trees
;
and
to
this
spot
the
children
used
to
come
to
me
.
They
could
not
bear
that
their
dear
Leon
should
love
a
poor
girl
without
shoes
to
her
feet
and
dressed
all
in
rags
and
tatters
.
So
,
would
you
believe
it
,
they
actually
clubbed
together
,
somehow
,
and
bought
her
shoes
and
stockings
,
and
some
linen
,
and
even
a
dress
!
I
ca
n't
understand
how
they
managed
it
,
but
they
did
it
,
all
together
.
When
I
asked
them
about
it
they
only
laughed
and
shouted
,
and
the
little
girls
clapped
their
hands
and
kissed
me
.
I
sometimes
went
to
see
Marie
secretly
,
too
.
She
had
become
very
ill
,
and
could
hardly
walk
.
She
still
went
with
the
herd
,
but
could
not
help
the
herdsman
any
longer
.
She
used
to
sit
on
a
stone
near
,
and
wait
there
almost
motionless
all
day
,
till
the
herd
went
home
.
Her
consumption
was
so
advanced
,
and
she
was
so
weak
,
that
she
used
to
sit
with
closed
eyes
,
breathing
heavily
.
Her
face
was
as
thin
as
a
skeleton
's
,
and
sweat
used
to
stand
on
her
white
brow
in
large
drops
.
I
always
found
her
sitting
just
like
that
.
I
used
to
come
up
quietly
to
look
at
her
;
but
Marie
would
hear
me
,
open
her
eyes
,
and
tremble
violently
as
she
kissed
my
hands
.
I
did
not
take
my
hand
away
because
it
made
her
happy
to
have
it
,
and
so
she
would
sit
and
cry
quietly
.
Sometimes
she
tried
to
speak
;
but
it
was
very
difficult
to
understand
her
.
She
was
almost
like
a
madwoman
,
with
excitement
and
ecstasy
,
whenever
I
came
.
Occasionally
the
children
came
with
me
;
when
they
did
so
,
they
would
stand
some
way
off
and
keep
guard
over
us
,
so
as
to
tell
me
if
anybody
came
near
.
This
was
a
great
pleasure
to
them
.
"
When
we
left
her
,
Marie
used
to
relapse
at
once
into
her
old
condition
,
and
sit
with
closed
eyes
and
motionless
limbs
.
One
day
she
could
not
go
out
at
all
,
and
remained
at
home
all
alone
in
the
empty
hut
;
but
the
children
very
soon
became
aware
of
the
fact
,
and
nearly
all
of
them
visited
her
that
day
as
she
lay
alone
and
helpless
in
her
miserable
bed
.
"
For
two
days
the
children
looked
after
her
,
and
then
,
when
the
village
people
got
to
know
that
Marie
was
really
dying
,
some
of
the
old
women
came
and
took
it
in
turns
to
sit
by
her
and
look
after
her
a
bit
.
I
think
they
began
to
be
a
little
sorry
for
her
in
the
village
at
last
;
at
all
events
they
did
not
interfere
with
the
children
any
more
,
on
her
account
.
"
Marie
lay
in
a
state
of
uncomfortable
delirium
the
whole
while
;
she
coughed
dreadfully
.
The
old
women
would
not
let
the
children
stay
in
the
room
;
but
they
all
collected
outside
the
window
each
morning
,
if
only
for
a
moment
,
and
shouted
'
Bon
jour
,
notre
bonne
Marie
!
'
and
Marie
no
sooner
caught
sight
of
,
or
heard
them
,
and
she
became
quite
animated
at
once
,
and
,
in
spite
of
the
old
women
,
would
try
to
sit
up
and
nod
her
head
and
smile
at
them
,
and
thank
them
.
The
little
ones
used
to
bring
her
nice
things
and
sweets
to
eat
,
but
she
could
hardly
touch
anything
.
Thanks
to
them
,
I
assure
you
,
the
girl
died
almost
perfectly
happy
.
She
almost
forgot
her
misery
,
and
seemed
to
accept
their
love
as
a
sort
of
symbol
of
pardon
for
her
offence
,
though
she
never
ceased
to
consider
herself
a
dreadful
sinner
.
They
used
to
flutter
at
her
window
just
like
little
birds
,
calling
out
:
'
Nous
t
'
aimons
,
Marie
!
'
"
She
died
very
soon
;
I
had
thought
she
would
live
much
longer
.
The
day
before
her
death
I
went
to
see
her
for
the
last
time
,
just
before
sunset
.
I
think
she
recognized
me
,
for
she
pressed
my
hand
.
"
Next
morning
they
came
and
told
me
that
Marie
was
dead
.
The
children
could
not
be
restrained
now
;
they
went
and
covered
her
coffin
with
flowers
,
and
put
a
wreath
of
lovely
blossoms
on
her
head
.
The
pastor
did
not
throw
any
more
shameful
words
at
the
poor
dead
woman
;
but
there
were
very
few
people
at
the
funeral
.
However
,
when
it
came
to
carrying
the
coffin
,
all
the
children
rushed
up
,
to
carry
it
themselves
.
Of
course
they
could
not
do
it
alone
,
but
they
insisted
on
helping
,
and
walked
alongside
and
behind
,
crying
.
"
They
have
planted
roses
all
round
her
grave
,
and
every
year
they
look
after
the
flowers
and
make
Marie
's
resting-place
as
beautiful
as
they
can
.
I
was
in
ill
odour
after
all
this
with
the
parents
of
the
children
,
and
especially
with
the
parson
and
schoolmaster
.
Schneider
was
obliged
to
promise
that
I
should
not
meet
them
and
talk
to
them
;
but
we
conversed
from
a
distance
by
signs
,
and
they
used
to
write
me
sweet
little
notes
.
Afterwards
I
came
closer
than
ever
to
those
little
souls
,
but
even
then
it
was
very
dear
to
me
,
to
have
them
so
fond
of
me
.
"
Schneider
said
that
I
did
the
children
great
harm
by
my
pernicious
'
system
'
;
what
nonsense
that
was
!
And
what
did
he
mean
by
my
system
?
He
said
afterwards
that
he
believed
I
was
a
child
myself
--
just
before
I
came
away
.
'
You
have
the
form
and
face
of
an
adult
'
he
said
,
'
but
as
regards
soul
,
and
character
,
and
perhaps
even
intelligence
,
you
are
a
child
in
the
completest
sense
of
the
word
,
and
always
will
be
,
if
you
live
to
be
sixty
.
'
I
laughed
very
much
,
for
of
course
that
is
nonsense
.
But
it
is
a
fact
that
I
do
not
care
to
be
among
grown-up
people
and
much
prefer
the
society
of
children
.
However
kind
people
may
be
to
me
,
I
never
feel
quite
at
home
with
them
,
and
am
always
glad
to
get
back
to
my
little
companions
.
Now
my
companions
have
always
been
children
,
not
because
I
was
a
child
myself
once
,
but
because
young
things
attract
me
.
