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- Джозеф Хеллер
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- Уловка 22
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- Стр. 272/452
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"
Well
,
I
certainly
can
’
t
understand
that
.
"
The
captain
was
piqued
,
but
managed
to
carry
on
with
a
pretense
of
optimism
.
"
Well
,
here
it
is
almost
September
already
,
so
I
guess
it
won
’
t
be
too
long
now
.
The
next
time
any
of
the
boys
ask
about
me
,
why
,
just
tell
them
I
’
ll
be
back
grinding
out
those
old
publicity
releases
again
as
soon
as
Chief
White
Halfoat
dies
of
pneumonia
.
Will
you
tell
them
that
?
Say
I
’
ll
be
back
in
the
squadron
as
soon
as
winter
comes
and
Chief
Halfoat
dies
of
pneumonia
.
Okay
?
"
The
chaplain
memorized
the
prophetic
words
solemnly
,
entranced
further
by
their
esoteric
import
.
"
Do
you
live
on
berries
,
herbs
and
roots
?
"
he
asked
.
"
No
,
of
course
not
,
"
the
captain
replied
with
surprise
.
"
I
sneak
into
the
mess
hall
through
the
back
and
eat
in
the
kitchen
.
Milo
gives
me
sandwiches
and
milk
.
"
"
What
do
you
do
when
it
rains
?
"
The
captain
answered
frankly
.
"
I
get
wet
.
"
"
Where
do
you
sleep
?
"
Swiftly
the
captain
ducked
down
into
a
crouch
and
began
backing
away
.
"
You
too
?
"
he
cried
frantically
.
"
Oh
,
no
,
"
cried
the
chaplain
.
"
I
swear
to
you
.
"
"
You
do
want
to
cut
my
throat
!
"
the
captain
insisted
.
"
I
give
my
word
,
"
the
chaplain
pleaded
,
but
it
was
too
late
,
for
the
homely
hirsute
specter
had
already
vanished
,
dissolving
so
expertly
inside
the
blooming
,
dappled
,
fragmented
malformations
of
leaves
,
light
and
shadows
that
the
chaplain
was
already
doubting
that
he
had
even
been
there
.
So
many
monstrous
events
were
occurring
that
he
was
no
longer
positive
which
events
were
monstrous
and
which
were
really
taking
place
.
He
wanted
to
find
out
about
the
madman
in
the
woods
as
quickly
as
possible
,
to
check
if
there
ever
really
had
been
a
Captain
Flume
,
but
his
first
chore
,
he
recalled
with
reluctance
,
was
to
appease
Corporal
Whitcomb
for
neglecting
to
delegate
enough
responsibility
to
him
.
He
plodded
along
the
zigzagging
path
through
the
forest
listlessly
,
clogged
with
thirst
and
feeling
almost
too
exhausted
to
go
on
.
He
was
remorseful
when
he
thought
of
Corporal
Whitcomb
.
He
prayed
that
Corporal
Whitcomb
would
be
gone
when
he
reached
the
clearing
so
that
he
could
undress
without
embarrassment
,
wash
his
arms
and
chest
and
shoulders
thoroughly
,
drink
water
,
lie
down
refreshed
and
perhaps
even
sleep
for
a
few
minutes
;
but
he
was
in
for
still
another
disappointment
and
still
another
shock
,
for
Corporal
Whitcomb
was
Sergeant
Whitcomb
by
the
time
he
arrived
and
was
sitting
with
his
shirt
off
in
the
chaplain
’
s
chair
sewing
his
new
sergeant
’
s
stripes
on
his
sleeve
with
the
chaplain
’
s
needle
and
thread
.
Corporal
Whitcomb
had
been
promoted
by
Colonel
Cathcart
,
who
wanted
to
see
the
chaplain
at
once
about
the
letters
.
"
Oh
,
no
,
"
groaned
the
chaplain
,
sinking
down
dumbfounded
on
his
cot
.
His
warm
canteen
was
empty
,
and
he
was
too
distraught
to
remember
the
lister
bag
hanging
outside
in
the
shade
between
the
two
tents
.
"
I
can
’
t
believe
it
.
I
just
can
’
t
believe
that
anyone
would
seriously
believe
that
I
’
ve
been
forging
Washington
Irving
’
s
name
.
"
