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- Джон Фоулз
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So
by
-
himself
.
So
indifferent
.
So
I
did
go
round
.
One
Saturday
morning
.
He
was
surprised
.
I
had
to
sit
in
silence
for
twenty
minutes
with
him
and
the
weird
Indian
music
.
He
got
straight
back
on
to
the
divan
and
lay
with
his
eyes
shut
,
as
if
I
shouldn
’
t
have
come
and
I
felt
I
ought
never
to
have
come
(
especially
without
telling
C
)
,
and
I
felt
as
well
that
it
really
was
a
bit
much
,
a
pose
.
I
couldn
’
t
relax
.
At
the
end
he
asked
me
about
myself
,
curtly
,
as
if
it
was
all
rather
a
bore
.
And
I
stupidly
tried
to
impress
him
.
Do
the
one
thing
I
shouldn
’
t
.
Show
off
.
I
kept
on
thinking
,
he
didn
’
t
really
mean
me
to
come
round
.
Suddenly
he
cut
me
short
and
took
me
round
the
room
and
made
me
look
at
things
.
His
studio
.
The
most
beautiful
room
.
I
always
feel
happy
there
.
Everything
in
harmony
.
Everything
expressing
only
him
(
it
’
s
not
deliberate
,
he
hates
"
interior
decoration
"
and
gimmicks
and
Vogue
)
.
But
it
’
s
all
him
.
Toinette
,
with
her
silly
female
House
and
Garden
ideas
of
austere
good
taste
,
calling
it
"
cluttered
.
"
I
could
have
bitten
her
head
off
.
The
feeling
that
someone
lives
all
his
life
in
it
,
works
in
it
,
thinks
in
it
,
is
it
.
And
we
thawed
out
.
I
stopped
trying
to
be
clever
.
He
showed
me
how
he
gets
his
"
haze
"
effect
.
Tonksing
gouache
.
With
all
his
little
home
-
made
tools
.
Some
friends
of
his
came
in
,
Barber
and
Frances
Cruik
-
shank
.
He
said
,
this
is
Miranda
Grey
I
can
’
t
stand
her
aunt
,
all
in
one
breath
,
and
they
laughed
,
they
were
old
friends
.
I
wanted
to
leave
.
But
they
were
going
for
a
walk
,
they
had
come
in
to
make
him
go
with
them
,
and
they
wanted
me
to
go
too
.
Barber
Cruikshank
did
;
he
had
special
seduction
eyes
for
me
.
Supposing
aunt
sees
us
,
G
.
P
.
said
.
Barber
’
s
got
the
foulest
reputation
in
Cornwall
.
I
said
,
she
’
s
my
aunt
.
Not
my
duenna
.
