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"
But
you
did
.
Only
I
don
’
t
know
what
to
do
about
it
.
"
On
the
way
from
the
bus
stop
to
her
apartment
,
she
said
,
"
I
’
m
not
going
to
the
convention
with
you
.
I
called
Professor
Nemur
this
morning
and
told
him
.
There
will
be
a
lot
for
you
to
do
there
.
Interesting
people
—
the
ex
citement
of
the
spotlight
for
a
while
.
I
don
’
t
want
to
be
in
the
way
—
"
"
Alice
—
"
"
—
and
no
matter
what
you
say
about
it
now
,
I
know
that
’
s
how
I
’
m
going
to
feel
,
so
if
you
don
’
t
mind
,
I
’
ll
hang
on
to
my
splintering
ego
—
thank
you
.
"
"
But
you
’
re
making
more
of
this
than
it
is
.
I
’
m
sure
if
you
’
ll
just
—
"
"
You
know
?
You
’
re
sure
?
"
She
turned
and
glared
at
me
on
the
front
steps
of
her
apartment
building
.
"
Oh
,
how
in
sufferable
you
’
ve
become
.
How
do
you
know
what
I
feel
?
You
take
liberties
with
other
people
’
s
minds
.
You
can
’
t
tell
how
I
feel
or
what
I
feel
or
why
I
feel
.
"
She
started
inside
and
then
she
looked
back
at
me
,
her
voice
shaky
:
"
I
’
ll
be
here
when
you
get
back
.
I
’
m
just
upset
,
that
’
s
all
,
and
I
want
both
of
us
to
have
a
chance
to
think
this
out
while
we
’
re
a
good
distance
apart
.
"
For
the
first
time
in
many
weeks
she
didn
’
t
ask
me
in
side
.
I
stared
at
the
closed
door
with
the
anger
mounting
inside
me
.
I
wanted
to
create
a
scene
,
to
bang
on
the
door
,
to
break
it
down
.
I
wanted
my
anger
to
consume
the
building
.
But
as
I
walked
away
I
felt
a
kind
of
simmering
,
then
cooling
,
and
finally
a
relief
.
I
walked
so
fast
I
was
drifting
along
the
streets
,
and
the
feeling
that
hit
my
cheek
was
a
cool
breeze
out
of
the
summer
night
.
Suddenly
free
.