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- Теодор Драйзер
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- Стр. 281/332
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"
The
thing
that
I
have
come
to
say
is
that
I
want
you
to
go
on
as
you
were
before
.
Whatever
you
may
think
of
me
or
of
what
I
have
just
told
you
,
I
want
you
to
believe
that
I
am
sincere
and
disinterested
in
what
I
am
telling
you
now
.
My
dream
in
connection
with
you
is
not
quite
over
.
Chance
might
make
me
eligible
if
you
should
happen
to
care
.
But
I
want
you
to
go
on
and
be
happy
,
regardless
of
me
.
I
have
dreamed
,
but
I
dare
say
it
has
been
a
mistake
.
Hold
your
head
high
--
you
have
a
right
to
.
Be
a
lady
.
Marry
any
one
you
really
love
.
I
will
see
that
you
have
a
suitable
marriage
portion
.
I
love
you
,
Berenice
,
but
I
will
make
it
a
fatherly
affection
from
now
on
.
When
I
die
I
will
put
you
in
my
will
.
But
go
on
now
in
the
spirit
you
were
going
before
.
I
really
ca
n't
be
happy
unless
I
think
you
are
going
to
be
.
"
He
paused
,
still
looking
at
her
,
believing
for
the
time
being
what
he
said
.
If
he
should
die
she
would
find
herself
in
his
will
.
If
she
were
to
go
on
and
socialize
and
seek
she
might
find
some
one
to
love
,
but
also
she
might
think
of
him
more
kindly
before
she
did
so
.
What
would
be
the
cost
of
her
as
a
ward
compared
to
his
satisfaction
and
delight
in
having
her
at
least
friendly
and
sympathetic
and
being
in
her
good
graces
and
confidence
?
Berenice
,
who
had
always
been
more
or
less
interested
in
him
,
temperamentally
biased
,
indeed
,
in
his
direction
because
of
his
efficiency
,
simplicity
,
directness
,
and
force
,
was
especially
touched
in
this
instance
by
his
utter
frankness
and
generosity
.
She
might
question
his
temperamental
control
over
his
own
sincerity
in
the
future
,
but
she
could
scarcely
question
that
at
present
he
was
sincere
.
Moreover
,
his
long
period
of
secret
love
and
admiration
,
the
thought
of
so
powerful
a
man
dreaming
of
her
in
this
fashion
,
was
so
flattering
.
It
soothed
her
troubled
vanity
and
shame
in
what
had
gone
before
.
His
straightforward
confession
had
a
kind
of
nobility
which
was
electric
,
moving
.
She
looked
at
him
as
he
stood
there
,
a
little
gray
about
the
temples
--
the
most
appealing
ornament
of
some
men
to
some
women
--
and
for
the
life
of
her
she
could
not
help
being
moved
by
a
kind
of
tenderness
,
sympathy
,
mothering
affection
.
Obviously
he
did
need
the
woman
his
attitude
seemed
to
show
that
he
needed
,
some
woman
of
culture
,
spirit
,
taste
,
amorousness
;
or
,
at
least
,
he
was
entitled
to
dream
of
her
.
As
he
stood
before
her
he
seemed
a
kind
of
superman
,
and
yet
also
a
bad
boy
--
handsome
,
powerful
,
hopeful
,
not
so
very
much
older
than
herself
now
,
impelled
by
some
blazing
internal
force
which
harried
him
on
and
on
.
How
much
did
he
really
care
for
her
?
How
much
could
he
?
How
much
could
he
care
for
any
one
?
Yet
see
all
he
had
done
to
interest
her
.
What
did
that
mean
?
To
say
all
this
?
To
do
all
this
?
Outside
was
his
car
brown
and
radiant
in
the
snow
.
He
was
the
great
Frank
Algernon
Cowperwood
,
of
Chicago
,
and
he
was
pleading
with
her
,
a
mere
chit
of
a
girl
,
to
be
kind
to
him
,
not
to
put
him
out
of
her
life
entirely
.
It
touched
her
intellect
,
her
pride
,
her
fancy
.
Aloud
she
said
:
"
I
like
you
better
now
.
I
really
believe
in
you
.
I
never
did
,
quite
,
before
.
Not
that
I
think
I
ought
to
let
you
spend
your
money
on
me
or
mother
--
I
do
n't
.
But
I
admire
you
.
You
make
me
.
I
understand
how
it
is
,
I
think
.
I
know
what
your
ambitions
are
.
I
have
always
felt
that
I
did
,
in
part
.
But
you
must
n't
talk
to
me
any
more
now
.
I
want
to
think
.
I
want
to
think
over
what
you
have
said
.
I
do
n't
know
whether
I
can
bring
myself
to
it
or
not
.
"
(
She
noticed
that
his
eyes
seemed
to
move
somehow
in
their
deepest
depths
again
.
)
"
But
we
wo
n't
talk
about
it
any
more
at
present
.
"
"
But
,
Berenice
,
"
he
added
,
with
a
real
plea
in
his
voice
,
"
I
wonder
if
you
do
understand
I
have
been
so
lonely
--
I
am
--
"
"
Yes
,
I
do
,
"
she
replied
,
holding
out
her
hand
.
"
We
are
going
to
be
friends
,
whatever
happens
,
from
now
on
,
because
I
really
like
you
.
You
must
n't
ask
me
to
decide
about
the
other
,
though
,
to-day
.
I
ca
n't
do
it
.
I
do
n't
want
to
.
I
do
n't
care
to
.
"
"
Not
when
I
would
so
gladly
give
you
everything
--
when
I
need
it
so
little
?
"
