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- Шарлотта Бронте
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- Джэйн Эйр
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- Стр. 391/445
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I
shuddered
as
he
spoke
:
I
felt
his
influence
in
my
marrow
--
his
hold
on
my
limbs
.
"
Seek
one
elsewhere
than
in
me
,
St.
John
:
seek
one
fitted
to
you
.
"
"
One
fitted
to
my
purpose
,
you
mean
--
fitted
to
my
vocation
.
Again
I
tell
you
it
is
not
the
insignificant
private
individual
--
the
mere
man
,
with
the
man
's
selfish
senses
--
I
wish
to
mate
:
it
is
the
missionary
.
"
"
And
I
will
give
the
missionary
my
energies
--
it
is
all
he
wants
--
but
not
myself
:
that
would
be
only
adding
the
husk
and
shell
to
the
kernel
.
For
them
he
has
no
use
:
I
retain
them
.
"
"
You
can
not
--
you
ought
not
.
Do
you
think
God
will
be
satisfied
with
half
an
oblation
?
Will
He
accept
a
mutilated
sacrifice
?
It
is
the
cause
of
God
I
advocate
:
it
is
under
His
standard
I
enlist
you
.
I
can
not
accept
on
His
behalf
a
divided
allegiance
:
it
must
be
entire
.
"
"
Oh
!
I
will
give
my
heart
to
God
,
"
I
said
.
"
you
do
not
want
it
.
"
I
will
not
swear
,
reader
,
that
there
was
not
something
of
repressed
sarcasm
both
in
the
tone
in
which
I
uttered
this
sentence
,
and
in
the
feeling
that
accompanied
it
.
I
had
silently
feared
St.
John
till
now
,
because
I
had
not
understood
him
.
He
had
held
me
in
awe
,
because
he
had
held
me
in
doubt
.
How
much
of
him
was
saint
,
how
much
mortal
,
I
could
not
heretofore
tell
:
but
revelations
were
being
made
in
this
conference
:
the
analysis
of
his
nature
was
proceeding
before
my
eyes
.
I
saw
his
fallibilities
:
I
comprehended
them
.
I
understood
that
,
sitting
there
where
I
did
,
on
the
bank
of
heath
,
and
with
that
handsome
form
before
me
,
I
sat
at
the
feet
of
a
man
,
caring
as
I
.
The
veil
fell
from
his
hardness
and
despotism
.
Having
felt
in
him
the
presence
of
these
qualities
,
I
felt
his
imperfection
and
took
courage
.
I
was
with
an
equal
--
one
with
whom
I
might
argue
--
one
whom
,
if
I
saw
good
,
I
might
resist
.
He
was
silent
after
I
had
uttered
the
last
sentence
,
and
I
presently
risked
an
upward
glance
at
his
countenance
.
His
eye
,
bent
on
me
,
expressed
at
once
stern
surprise
and
keen
inquiry
.
"
Is
she
sarcastic
,
and
sarcastic
to
me
!
"
it
seemed
to
say
.
"
What
does
this
signify
?
"
