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"
Got
to
go
,
"
I
said
quietly
.
"
Next
time
you
see
this
face
,
it
won
t
be
me
wearing
it
,
so
if
there
s
anything
you
want
to
say
"
Ortega
s
face
flinched
almost
imperceptibly
as
I
said
it
.
I
cursed
myself
for
the
awkwardness
and
tried
to
take
her
hand
.
"
Look
,
if
it
makes
it
any
easier
,
no
one
knows
.
Bautista
probably
suspects
we
got
it
together
,
but
no
one
really
knows
.
"
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"
I
know
,
"
she
said
sharply
,
not
giving
me
her
hand
.
"
I
remember
.
"
I
sighed
.
"
Yeah
,
so
do
I
.
It
s
worth
remembering
,
Kristin
.
But
don
t
let
it
fuck
up
the
rest
of
your
life
.
Go
get
Ryker
back
,
and
get
on
to
the
next
screen
.
That
s
what
counts
.
Oh
yeah
"
I
reached
into
my
coat
and
extracted
a
crumpled
cigarette
packet
.
"
And
you
can
have
these
back
.
I
don
t
need
them
any
more
,
and
nor
does
he
,
so
don
t
start
him
off
again
.
You
owe
me
that
much
,
at
least
.
Just
make
sure
he
stays
quit
.
"
She
blinked
and
kissed
me
abruptly
,
somewhere
between
mouth
and
cheek
.
It
was
an
inaccuracy
I
didn
t
try
to
correct
either
way
.
I
turned
away
before
I
could
see
if
there
were
going
to
be
any
tears
and
started
for
the
doors
at
the
far
end
of
the
hall
.
I
looked
back
once
,
as
I
was
mounting
the
steps
.
Ortega
was
still
standing
there
,
arms
wrapped
around
herself
,
watching
me
leave
.
In
the
stormlight
,
it
was
too
far
away
to
see
her
face
clearly
.
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For
a
moment
something
ached
in
me
,
something
so
deep
-
rooted
that
I
knew
to
tear
it
out
would
be
to
undo
the
essence
of
what
held
me
together
.
The
feeling
rose
and
splashed
like
the
rain
behind
my
eyes
,
swelling
as
the
drumming
on
the
roof
panels
grew
and
the
glass
ran
with
water
.
Then
I
had
it
locked
down
.
I
turned
back
to
the
next
step
,
found
a
chuckle
somewhere
in
my
chest
and
coughed
it
out
.
The
chuckle
fired
up
and
became
a
laugh
of
sorts
.