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"
You
can
go
fuck
yourself
,
Kawahara
.
"
I
dropped
my
cigarette
on
the
engraved
stonework
and
ground
it
out
with
my
heel
.
"
I
’
ll
take
my
chances
with
Kadmin
,
and
let
Bancroft
know
you
probably
had
him
killed
.
So
.
Change
your
mind
about
letting
me
live
now
?
"
My
hands
hung
open
at
my
sides
,
twitching
to
be
filled
with
the
rough
woven
bulk
of
handgun
butts
.
I
was
going
to
put
three
Nemex
shells
through
Kawahara
’
s
throat
,
at
stack
height
,
then
put
the
gun
in
my
mouth
and
blow
my
own
stack
apart
.
Kawahara
almost
certainly
had
remote
storage
anyway
,
but
fuck
it
,
you
’
ve
got
to
make
a
stand
somewhere
.
And
a
man
can
only
stave
off
his
own
death
wish
for
so
long
.
It
could
have
been
worse
.
It
could
have
been
Innenin
.
Kawahara
shook
her
head
regretfully
.
She
was
smiling
.
"
Always
the
same
Kovacs
.
Full
of
sound
and
fury
,
signifying
nothing
.
Romantic
nihilism
.
Haven
’
t
you
learnt
anything
since
New
Beijing
?
"
"
There
are
some
arenas
so
corrupt
that
the
only
clean
acts
possible
are
nihilistic
.
"
"
Oh
,
that
’
s
Quell
,
isn
’
t
it
?
Mine
was
Shakespeare
,
but
then
I
don
’
t
expect
colonial
culture
goes
back
that
far
,
does
it
?
"
She
was
still
smiling
,
poised
like
a
total
body
theatre
gymnast
about
to
launch
into
her
aria
.
For
a
moment
I
suffered
the
almost
hallucinatory
conviction
that
she
was
going
to
break
into
a
little
dance
,
choreographed
to
a
junk
rhythm
beat
from
speakers
hidden
in
the
dome
above
us
.
"
Takeshi
,
where
did
you
get
this
belief
that
everything
can
be
resolved
with
such
brute
simplicity
?
Surely
not
from
the
Envoys
?
Was
it
the
Newpest
gangs
?
The
thrashings
your
father
gave
you
as
a
child
?
Did
you
really
think
I
would
allow
you
to
force
my
hand
?
Did
you
really
think
I
would
have
come
to
the
table
this
empty
-
handed
?
Think
about
it
.
You
know
me
.
Did
you
really
believe
it
would
be
this
easy
?
"
The
neurachem
seethed
within
me
.
I
bit
it
back
,
hung
from
the
moment
like
a
parachutist
braced
in
the
jump
hatch
.
"
All
right
,
"
I
said
evenly
.
"
Impress
me
.
"