Скорбь сатаны/The Tribulation of Satan (Мари Корелли). Страница 279 из 279

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it

was

a

privilege

of

which

I

felt

myself

unworthy

!

I

folded

the

letter

and

put

it

near

my

heart

to

serve

me

as

a

talisman

,

...

she

,

of

all

bright

creatures

in

the

world

surely

knew

the

secret

of

happiness

!

...

Some-day

,

...

yes

,

...

I

would

go

and

see

her

,

...

my

Mavis

that

sang

in

her

garden

of

lilies

--

some

day

when

I

had

force

and

manliness

enough

to

tell

her

all

--

save

my

love

for

her

!

For

that

,

I

felt

,

must

never

be

spoken

--

Self

must

resist

Self

,

and

clamour

no

more

at

the

gate

of

a

forfeited

Paradise

!

Some

day

I

would

see

her

,

...

but

not

for

a

long

time

,

...

not

till

I

had

,

in

part

at

least

,

worked

out

my

secret

expiation

.

As

I

sat

musing

thus

,

a

strange

memory

came

into

my

brain

,

...

I

thought

I

heard

a

voice

resembling

my

own

,

which

said

--

"

Lift

,

oh

lift

the

shrouding

veil

,

spirit

of

the

City

Beautiful

!

For

I

feel

I

shall

read

in

your

eyes

the

secret

of

happiness

!

"

A

cold

shudder

ran

through

me

--

I

sprang

up

erect

,

in

a

kind

of

horror

.

Leaning

at

my

open

window

I

looked

down

into

the

busy

street

below

--

and

my

thoughts

reverted

to

the

strange

things

I

had

seen

in

the

East

--

the

face

of

the

dead

Egyptian

dancer

,

uncovered

to

the

light

again

after

two

thousand

years

--

the

face

of

Sibyl

!

--

then

I

remembered

the

vision

of

the

"

City

Beautiful

,

"

in

which

one

face

had

remained

veiled

--

the

face

I

most

desired

to

see

!

--

--

and

I

trembled

more

and

more

as

my

mind

,

despite

my

will

,

began

to

weave

together

links

of

the

past

and

present

,

till

they

seemed

growing

into

one

and

the

same

.

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Was

I

again

to

be

the

prey

of

evil

forces

?

--

--

did

some

new

danger

threaten

me

?

--

had

I

,

by

some

unconscious

wicked

wish

invited

new

temptation

to

assail

me

?

Overcome

by

my

sensations

,

I

left

my

work

and

went

out

into

the

fresh

air

,

...

it

was

late

at

night

--

and

the

moon

was

shining

.

I

felt

for

the

letter

of

Mavis

--

it

pressed

against

my

heart

,

a

shield

against

all

vileness

.

The

room

I

occupied

was

in

a

house

not

far

from

Westminster

Abbey

,

and

I

instinctively

bent

my

steps

towards

that

grey

old

shrine

of

kings

and

poets

dead

.

The

square

around

it

was

almost

deserted

--

--

I

slackened

my

pace

,

strolling

meditatively

along

the

narrow

paved

way

that

forms

a

short

cut

across

into

Old

Palace

Yard

,

...

when

suddenly

a

Shadow

crossed

my

path

,

and

looking

up

,

I

came

face

to

face

with

--

--

Lucio

!

The

same

as

ever

--

the

perfect

impersonation

of

perfect

manhood

!

...

his

countenance

,

pale

,

proud

,

sorrowful

yet

scornful

,

flashed

upon

me

like

a

star

!

--

--

he

looked

full

at

me

,

and

a

questioning

smile

rested

on

his

lips

!

My

heart

almost

stopped

beating

,

...

I

drew

a

quick

sharp

breath

,

...

again

I

felt

for

the

letter

of

Mavis

,

and

then

,

...

meeting

his

gaze

fixedly

and

straightly

in

my

turn

,

I

moved

slowly

on

in

silence

.

He

understood

--

his

eyes

flashed

with

the

jewel-like

strange

brilliancy

I

knew

so

well

,

and

so

well

remembered

--

and

drawing

back

he

stood

aside

and

--

let

me

pass

!

I

continued

my

walk

steadily

,

though

dazed

and

like

one

in

a

dream

--

till

reaching

the

shadowed

side

of

the

street

opposite

the

Houses

of

Parliament

,

I

stopped

for

a

moment

to

recover

my

startled

senses

.

There

again

I

saw

him

!

--

--

the

superb

man

's

form

--

the

Angel

's

face

--

the

haunting

,

splendid

sorrowful

eyes

!

--

--

he

came

with

his

usual

ease

and

grace

of

step

into

the

full

moonlight

and

paused

--

apparently

waiting

for

some

one

.

For

me

?

--

ah

no

!

--

I

kept

the

name

of

God

upon

my

lips

--

I

gathered

all

the

strength

of

faith

within

my

soul

--

and

though

I

was

wholesomely

afraid

of

Myself

,

I

feared

no

other

foe

!

I

lingered

therefore

--

watching

;

--

and

presently

I

saw

a

few

members

of

Parliament

walking

singly

and

in

groups

towards

the

House

--

one

or

two

greeted

the

tall

dark

Figure

as

a

friend

and

familiar

,

and

others

knew

him

not

.

Still

he

waited

on

,

...

and

so

did

I

.

At

last

,

just

as

Big

Ben

chimed

the

quarter

to

eleven

,

one

man

whom

I

instantly

recognised

as

a

well-known

Cabinet

minister

,

came

walking

briskly

towards

the

House

,

...

then

,

and

then

only

,

He

,

whom

I

had

known

as

Lucio

,

advanced

smiling

.

Greeting

the

minister

cordially

,

in

that

musical

rich

voice

I

knew

of

old

,

he

took

his

arm

--

and

they

both

walked

on

slowly

,

talking

earnestly

.

I

watched

them

till

their

figures

receded

in

the

moonlight

,

...

the

one

tall

,

kingly

and

commanding

,

.

.

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the

other

burly

and

broad

,

and

self-assertive

in

demeanour

;

--

I

saw

them

ascend

the

steps

,

and

finally

disappear

within

the

House

of

England

's

Imperial

Government

--

Devil

and

Man

--

together

!

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