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The
big
,
hard
body
had
a
tough
grip
on
life
.
It
fought
a
long
time
against
having
it
taken
away
,
flailing
and
thrashing
around
so
much
I
finally
had
to
lie
full
length
on
top
of
it
and
scissor
the
kicking
legs
with
mine
while
I
mashed
the
pillow
into
the
face
.
I
lay
there
on
top
of
the
body
for
what
seemed
days
.
Until
the
thrashing
stopped
.
Until
it
was
still
a
while
and
had
shuddered
once
and
was
still
again
.
Then
I
rolled
off
.
I
lifted
the
pillow
,
and
in
the
moonlight
I
saw
the
expression
had
n't
changed
from
the
blank
,
dead-end
look
the
least
bit
,
even
under
suffocation
.
I
took
my
thumbs
and
pushed
the
lids
down
and
held
them
till
they
stayed
.
Then
I
lay
back
on
my
bed
.
I
lay
for
a
while
,
holding
the
covers
over
my
face
,
and
thought
I
was
being
pretty
quiet
,
but
Scanlon
's
voice
hissing
from
his
bed
let
me
know
I
was
n't
.
"
Take
it
easy
,
Chief
,
"
he
said
.
"
Take
it
easy
.
It
's
okay
.
"
"
Shut
up
,
"
I
whispered
.
"
Go
back
to
sleep
.
"
It
was
quiet
a
while
;
then
I
heard
him
hiss
again
and
ask
,
"
Is
it
finished
?
"
I
told
him
yeah
.
"
Christ
,
"
he
said
then
,
"
she
'll
know
.
You
realize
that
,
do
n't
you
?
Sure
,
nobody
'll
be
able
to
prove
anything
--
anybody
coulda
kicked
off
in
post-operative
like
he
was
,
happens
all
the
time
--
but
her
,
she
'll
know
.
"
I
did
n't
say
anything
.
"
Was
I
you
,
Chief
,
I
'd
breeze
my
tail
outa
here
.
Yessir
.
I
tell
you
what
.
You
leave
outa
here
,
and
I
'll
say
I
saw
him
up
and
moving
around
after
you
lift
and
cover
you
that
way
.
That
's
the
best
idea
,
do
n't
you
think
?
"
