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The
ringing
did
n't
stop
until
the
meeting
that
afternoon
.
I
'd
been
half
listening
to
them
work
on
Sefelt
to
get
him
to
face
up
to
the
reality
of
his
problems
so
he
could
adjust
(
"
It
's
the
Dilantin
!
"
he
finally
yells
.
"
Now
,
Mr.
Sefelt
,
if
you
're
to
be
helped
,
you
must
be
honest
,
"
she
says
.
"
But
,
it
's
got
to
be
the
Dilantin
that
does
it
;
do
n't
it
make
my
gums
soft
?
"
She
smiles
.
"
Jim
,
you
're
forty-five
years
old
...
"
)
when
I
happened
to
catch
a
look
at
McMurphy
sitting
in
his
corner
.
He
was
n't
fiddling
with
a
deck
of
cards
or
dozing
into
a
magazine
like
he
had
been
during
all
the
meetings
the
last
two
weeks
.
And
he
was
n't
slouched
down
.
He
was
sitting
up
stiff
in
his
chair
with
a
flushed
,
reckless
look
on
his
face
as
he
looked
back
and
forth
from
Sefelt
to
the
Big
Nurse
.
As
I
watched
,
the
ringing
went
higher
.
His
eyes
were
blue
stripes
under
those
white
eyebrows
,
and
they
shot
back
and
forth
just
the
way
he
watched
cards
turning
up
around
a
poker
table
.
I
was
certain
that
any
minute
he
was
going
to
do
some
crazy
thing
to
get
him
up
on
Disturbed
for
sure
.
I
'd
seen
the
same
look
on
other
guys
before
they
'd
climbed
all
over
a
black
boy
.
I
gripped
down
on
the
arm
of
my
chair
and
waited
,
scared
it
would
happen
,
and
,
I
began
to
realize
,
just
a
little
scared
it
would
n't
.
He
kept
quiet
and
watched
till
they
were
finished
with
Sefelt
;
then
he
swung
half
around
in
his
chair
and
watched
while
Fredrickson
,
trying
some
way
to
get
back
at
them
for
the
way
they
had
grilled
his
friend
,
griped
for
a
few
loud
minutes
about
the
cigarettes
being
kept
in
the
Nurses
'
Station
.
Fredrickson
talked
himself
out
and
finally
flushed
and
apologized
like
always
and
sat
back
down
.
McMurphy
still
had
n't
made
any
kind
of
move
.
I
eased
up
where
I
'd
been
gripping
the
arm
of
the
chair
,
beginning
to
think
I
'd
been
wrong
.
There
was
just
a
couple
of
minutes
left
in
the
meeting
.
The
Big
Nurse
folded
up
her
papers
and
put
them
in
the
basket
and
set
the
basket
off
her
lap
on
the
floor
,
then
let
her
eyes
swing
to
McMurphy
for
just
a
second
like
she
wanted
to
check
if
he
was
awake
and
listening
.
She
folded
her
hands
in
her
lap
and
looked
down
at
the
fingers
and
drew
a
deep
breath
,
shaking
her
head
.
"
Boys
,
I
've
given
a
great
deal
of
thought
to
what
I
am
about
to
say
.
I
've
talked
it
over
with
the
doctor
and
with
the
rest
of
the
staff
,
and
,
as
much
as
we
regretted
it
,
we
all
came
to
the
same
conclusion
--
that
there
should
be
some
manner
of
punishment
meted
out
for
the
unspeakable
behavior
concerning
the
house
duties
three
weeks
ago
.
"
She
raised
her
hand
and
looked
around
.
"
We
waited
this
long
to
say
anything
,
hoping
that
you
men
would
take
it
upon
yourselves
to
apologize
for
the
rebellious
way
you
acted
.
But
not
a
one
of
you
has
shown
the
slightest
sign
of
remorse
.
"
Her
hand
went
up
again
to
stop
any
interruptions
that
might
come
--
the
movement
of
a
tarot-card
reader
in
a
glass
arcade
case
.
"
Please
understand
:
We
do
not
impose
certain
rules
and
restrictions
on
you
without
a
great
deal
of
thought
about
their
therapeutic
value
.
A
good
many
of
you
are
in
here
because
you
could
not
adjust
to
the
rules
of
society
in
the
Outside
World
,
because
you
refused
to
face
up
to
them
,
because
you
tried
to
circumvent
them
and
avoid
them
.
At
some
time
--
perhaps
in
your
childhood
--
you
may
have
been
allowed
to
get
away
with
flouting
the
rules
of
society
.
When
you
broke
a
rule
you
knew
it
.
You
wanted
to
be
dealt
with
,
needed
it
,
but
the
punishment
did
not
come
.
That
foolish
lenience
on
the
part
of
your
parents
may
have
been
the
germ
that
grew
into
your
present
illness
.
I
tell
you
this
hoping
you
will
understand
that
it
is
entirely
for
your
own
good
that
we
enforce
discipline
and
order
.
"
She
let
her
head
twist
around
the
room
.
Regret
for
the
job
she
has
to
do
was
worked
into
her
face
.
It
was
quiet
except
for
that
high
fevered
,
delirious
ringing
in
my
head
.
