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He
who
despises
most
things
will
be
a
lawgiver
among
them
and
he
who
dares
most
of
all
will
be
most
in
the
right
!
So
it
has
been
till
now
and
so
it
will
always
be
.
A
man
must
be
blind
not
to
see
it
!
Though
Raskolnikov
looked
at
Sonia
as
he
said
this
,
he
no
longer
cared
whether
she
understood
or
not
.
The
fever
had
complete
hold
of
him
;
he
was
in
a
sort
of
gloomy
ecstasy
(
he
certainly
had
been
too
long
without
talking
to
anyone
)
.
Sonia
felt
that
his
gloomy
creed
had
become
his
faith
and
code
.
I
divined
then
,
Sonia
,
he
went
on
eagerly
,
that
power
is
only
vouchsafed
to
the
man
who
dares
to
stoop
and
pick
it
up
.
There
is
only
one
thing
,
one
thing
needful
:
one
has
only
to
dare
!
Then
for
the
first
time
in
my
life
an
idea
took
shape
in
my
mind
which
no
one
had
ever
thought
of
before
me
,
no
one
!
I
saw
clear
as
daylight
how
strange
it
is
that
not
a
single
person
living
in
this
mad
world
has
had
the
daring
to
go
straight
for
it
all
and
send
it
flying
to
the
devil
!
I
.
.
.
I
wanted
to
have
the
daring
.
.
.
and
I
killed
her
.
I
only
wanted
to
have
the
daring
,
Sonia
!
That
was
the
whole
cause
of
it
!
Отключить рекламу
Oh
hush
,
hush
,
cried
Sonia
,
clasping
her
hands
.
You
turned
away
from
God
and
God
has
smitten
you
,
has
given
you
over
to
the
devil
!
Then
Sonia
,
when
I
used
to
lie
there
in
the
dark
and
all
this
became
clear
to
me
,
was
it
a
temptation
of
the
devil
,
eh
?
Hush
,
don
t
laugh
,
blasphemer
!
You
don
t
understand
,
you
don
t
understand
!
Oh
God
!
He
won
t
understand
!
Hush
,
Sonia
!
I
am
not
laughing
.
I
know
myself
that
it
was
the
devil
leading
me
.
Отключить рекламу
Hush
,
Sonia
,
hush
!
he
repeated
with
gloomy
insistence
.
I
know
it
all
,
I
have
thought
it
all
over
and
over
and
whispered
it
all
over
to
myself
,
lying
there
in
the
dark
.
.
.
.
I
ve
argued
it
all
over
with
myself
,
every
point
of
it
,
and
I
know
it
all
,
all
!
And
how
sick
,
how
sick
I
was
then
of
going
over
it
all
!
I
have
kept
wanting
to
forget
it
and
make
a
new
beginning
,
Sonia
,
and
leave
off
thinking
.
And
you
don
t
suppose
that
I
went
into
it
headlong
like
a
fool
?
I
went
into
it
like
a
wise
man
,
and
that
was
just
my
destruction
.
And
you
mustn
t
suppose
that
I
didn
t
know
,
for
instance
,
that
if
I
began
to
question
myself
whether
I
had
the
right
to
gain
power
I
certainly
hadn
t
the
right
or
that
if
I
asked
myself
whether
a
human
being
is
a
louse
it
proved
that
it
wasn
t
so
for
me
,
though
it
might
be
for
a
man
who
would
go
straight
to
his
goal
without
asking
questions
.
.
.
.
If
I
worried
myself
all
those
days
,
wondering
whether
Napoleon
would
have
done
it
or
not
,
I
felt
clearly
of
course
that
I
wasn
t
Napoleon
.
I
had
to
endure
all
the
agony
of
that
battle
of
ideas
,
Sonia
,
and
I
longed
to
throw
it
off
:
I
wanted
to
murder
without
casuistry
,
to
murder
for
my
own
sake
,
for
myself
alone
!
I
didn
t
want
to
lie
about
it
even
to
myself
.
It
wasn
t
to
help
my
mother
I
did
the
murder
that
s
nonsense
I
didn
t
do
the
murder
to
gain
wealth
and
power
and
to
become
a
benefactor
of
mankind
.
Nonsense
!
I
simply
did
it
;
I
did
the
murder
for
myself
,
for
myself
alone
,
and
whether
I
became
a
benefactor
to
others
,
or
spent
my
life
like
a
spider
catching
men
in
my
web
and
sucking
the
life
out
of
men
,
I
couldn
t
have
cared
at
that
moment
.
.
.
.
And
it
was
not
the
money
I
wanted
,
Sonia
,
when
I
did
it
.
It
was
not
so
much
the
money
I
wanted
,
but
something
else
.
.
.
.
I
know
it
all
now
.
.
.
.
Understand
me
!
Perhaps
I
should
never
have
committed
a
murder
again
.
I
wanted
to
find
out
something
else
;
it
was
something
else
led
me
on
.
I
wanted
to
find
out
then
and
quickly
whether
I
was
a
louse
like
everybody
else
or
a
man
.
Whether
I
can
step
over
barriers
or
not
,
whether
I
dare
stoop
to
pick
up
or
not
,
whether
I
am
a
trembling
creature
or
whether
I
have
the
right
.
.
.
To
kill
?
Have
the
right
to
kill
?
Sonia
clasped
her
hands
.