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"
So
it
’
s
really
no
wonder
that
I
want
so
desperately
to
learn
this
language
.
Depression
and
Loneliness
track
me
down
after
about
ten
days
in
Italy
.
I
am
walking
through
the
Villa
Borghese
one
evening
after
a
happy
day
spent
in
school
,
and
the
sun
is
setting
gold
over
St
.
Peter
’
s
Basilica
.
I
am
feeling
contented
in
this
romantic
scene
,
even
if
I
am
all
by
myself
,
while
everyone
else
in
the
park
is
either
fondling
a
lover
or
playing
with
a
laughing
child
.
But
I
stop
to
lean
against
a
balustrade
and
watch
the
sunset
,
and
I
get
to
thinking
a
little
too
much
,
and
then
my
thinking
turns
to
brooding
,
and
that
’
s
when
they
catch
up
with
me
.
They
come
upon
me
all
silent
and
menacing
like
Pinkerton
Detectives
,
and
they
flank
me
-
Depression
on
my
left
,
Loneliness
on
my
right
.
They
don
’
t
need
to
show
me
their
badges
.
I
know
these
guys
very
well
.
We
’
ve
been
playing
a
cat
-
and
-
mouse
game
for
years
now
.
Though
I
admit
that
I
am
surprised
to
meet
them
in
this
elegant
Italian
garden
at
dusk
.
This
is
no
place
they
belong
.
I
say
to
them
,
"
How
did
you
find
me
here
?
Who
told
you
I
had
come
to
Rome
?
"
Depression
,
always
the
wise
guy
,
says
,
"
What
-
you
’
re
not
happy
to
see
us
?
"
"
Go
away
,
"
I
tell
him
.
Loneliness
,
the
more
sensitive
cop
,
says
,
"
I
’
m
sorry
,
ma
’
am
.
But
I
might
have
to
tail
you
the
whole
time
you
’
re
traveling
.
It
’
s
my
assignment
.
"
"
I
’
d
really
rather
you
didn
’
t
,
"
I
tell
him
,
and
he
shrugs
almost
apologetically
,
but
only
moves
closer
.
Then
they
frisk
me
.
They
empty
my
pockets
of
any
joy
I
had
been
carrying
there
.
Depression
even
confiscates
my
identity
;
but
he
always
does
that
.
Then
Loneliness
starts
interrogating
me
,
which
I
dread
because
it
always
goes
on
for
hours
.
