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"
Tick
-
Tock
,
Cheyenne
or
Starlight
?
"
I
ask
.
"
Tick
-
Tock
,
dude
.
"
"
Ever
try
the
egg
creams
at
Tick
-
Tock
?
"
He
moans
,
"
Oh
my
God
,
I
know
…
"
I
feel
his
longing
for
New
York
so
deeply
that
for
a
moment
I
mistake
it
for
my
own
.
His
homesickness
infects
me
so
completely
that
I
forget
for
an
instant
that
I
am
actually
free
to
go
back
to
Manhattan
someday
,
though
he
is
not
.
He
fiddles
a
bit
with
the
two
sticks
of
the
Twin
Towers
,
anchors
them
more
solidly
in
the
sand
,
then
looks
out
at
the
hushed
,
blue
ocean
and
says
,
"
I
know
it
’
s
beautiful
here
…
but
do
you
think
I
’
ll
ever
see
America
again
?
"
What
can
I
tell
him
?
We
slump
into
silence
.
Then
he
pops
out
of
his
mouth
the
yucky
Indonesian
hard
candy
he
’
s
been
sucking
on
for
the
last
hour
and
says
,
"
Dude
,
this
candy
tastes
like
ass
.
Where
’
d
you
get
it
?
"
"
From
your
mother
,
dude
,
"
I
say
.
"
From
your
mother
.
"
When
we
return
to
Ubud
,
I
go
straight
back
to
Felipe
’
s
house
and
don
’
t
leave
his
bedroom
for
approximately
another
month
.
This
is
only
the
faintest
of
exaggerations
.
I
have
never
been
loved
and
adored
like
this
before
by
anyone
,
never
with
such
pleasure
and
single
-
minded
concentration
.
Never
have
I
been
so
unpeeled
,
revealed
,
unfurled
and
hurled
through
the
event
of
lovemaking
.
One
thing
I
do
know
about
intimacy
is
that
there
are
certain
natural
laws
which
govern
the
sexual
experience
of
two
people
,
and
that
these
laws
cannot
be
budged
any
more
than
gravity
can
be
negotiated
with
.
To
feel
physically
comfortable
with
someone
else
’
s
body
is
not
a
decision
you
can
make
.
It
has
very
little
to
do
with
how
two
people
think
or
act
or
talk
or
even
look
.
The
mysterious
magnet
is
either
there
,
buried
somewhere
deep
behind
the
sternum
,
or
it
is
not
.
When
it
isn
’
t
there
(
as
I
have
learned
in
the
past
,
with
heartbreaking
clarity
)
you
can
no
more
force
it
to
exist
than
a
surgeon
can
force
a
patient
’
s
body
to
accept
a
kidney
from
the
wrong
donor
.
My
friend
Annie
says
it
all
comes
down
to
one
simple
question
:
"
Do
you
want
your
belly
pressed
against
this
person
’
s
belly
forever
-
or
not
?
"
