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- Элизабет Гилберт
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- Ешь, молись, люби
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Then
I
shut
my
eyes
and
I
said
,
"
Dear
Lord
,
please
show
me
everything
I
need
to
understand
about
forgiveness
and
surrender
.
"
What
I
had
wanted
for
so
long
was
to
have
an
actual
conversation
with
my
ex
-
husband
,
but
this
was
obviously
never
going
to
happen
.
What
I
had
been
craving
was
a
resolution
,
a
peace
summit
,
from
which
we
could
emerge
with
a
united
understanding
of
what
had
occurred
in
our
marriage
,
and
a
mutual
forgiveness
for
the
ugliness
of
our
divorce
.
But
months
of
counseling
and
mediation
had
only
made
us
more
divided
and
locked
our
positions
solid
,
turning
us
into
two
people
who
were
absolutely
incapable
of
giving
each
other
any
release
.
Yet
it
’
s
what
we
both
needed
,
I
was
sure
of
it
.
And
I
was
sure
of
this
,
too
-
that
the
rules
of
transcendence
insist
that
you
will
not
advance
even
one
inch
closer
to
divinity
as
long
as
you
cling
to
even
one
last
seductive
thread
of
blame
.
As
smoking
is
to
the
lungs
,
so
is
resentment
to
the
soul
;
even
one
puff
of
it
is
bad
for
you
.
I
mean
,
what
kind
of
prayer
is
this
to
imbibe
-
"
Give
us
this
day
our
daily
grudge
"
?
You
might
just
as
well
hang
it
up
and
kiss
God
good
-
bye
if
you
really
need
to
keep
blaming
somebody
else
for
your
own
life
’
s
limitations
.
So
what
I
asked
of
God
that
night
on
the
Ashram
roof
was
-
given
the
reality
that
I
would
probably
never
speak
to
my
ex
-
husband
again
-
might
there
be
some
level
upon
which
we
could
communicate
?
Some
level
on
which
we
could
forgive
?
I
lay
up
there
,
high
above
the
world
,
and
I
was
all
alone
.
I
dropped
into
meditation
and
waited
to
be
told
what
to
do
.
I
don
’
t
know
how
many
minutes
or
hours
passed
before
I
knew
what
to
do
.
I
realized
I
’
d
been
thinking
about
all
this
too
literally
.
I
’
d
been
wanting
to
talk
to
my
ex
-
husband
?
So
talk
to
him
.
Talk
to
him
right
now
.
I
’
d
been
waiting
to
be
offered
forgiveness
?
Offer
it
up
personally
,
then
.
Right
now
.
I
thought
of
how
many
people
go
to
their
graves
unforgiven
and
unforgiving
.
I
thought
of
how
many
people
have
had
siblings
or
friends
or
children
or
lovers
disappear
from
their
lives
before
precious
words
of
clemency
or
absolution
could
be
passed
along
.
How
do
the
survivors
of
terminated
relationships
ever
endure
the
pain
of
unfinished
business
?
From
that
place
of
meditation
,
I
found
the
answer
-
you
can
finish
the
business
yourself
,
from
within
yourself
.
It
’
s
not
only
possible
,
it
’
s
essential
.
And
then
,
to
my
surprise
,
still
in
meditation
,
I
did
an
odd
thing
.
I
invited
my
ex
-
husband
to
please
join
me
up
here
on
this
rooftop
in
India
.
I
asked
him
if
he
would
be
kind
enough
to
meet
me
up
here
for
this
farewell
event
.
Then
I
waited
until
I
felt
him
arrive
.
And
he
did
arrive
.
His
presence
was
suddenly
absolute
and
tangible
.
I
could
practically
smell
him
.
I
said
,
"
Hi
,
sweetie
.
"
I
almost
started
to
cry
right
then
,
but
quickly
realized
I
didn
’
t
need
to
.
Tears
are
part
of
this
bodily
life
,
and
the
place
where
these
two
souls
were
meeting
that
night
in
India
had
nothing
to
do
with
the
body
.
The
two
people
who
needed
to
talk
to
each
other
up
there
on
the
roof
were
not
even
people
anymore
.
They
wouldn
’
t
even
be
talking
.
They
weren
’
t
even
ex
-
spouses
,
not
an
obstinate
midwesterner
and
a
high
-
strung
Yankee
,
not
a
guy
in
his
forties
and
a
woman
in
her
thirties
,
not
two
limited
people
who
had
argued
for
years
about
sex
and
money
and
furniture
-
none
of
this
was
relevant
.
For
the
purposes
of
this
meeting
,
at
the
level
of
this
reunion
,
they
were
just
two
cool
blue
souls
who
already
understood
everything
.
Unbound
by
their
bodies
,
unbound
by
the
complex
history
of
their
past
relationship
,
they
came
together
above
this
roof
(
above
me
,
even
)
in
infinite
wisdom
.
Still
in
meditation
,
I
watched
these
two
cool
blue
souls
circle
each
other
,
merge
,
divide
again
and
regard
each
other
’
s
perfection
and
similarity
.
They
knew
everything
.
They
knew
everything
long
ago
and
they
will
always
know
everything
.
They
didn
’
t
need
to
forgive
each
other
;
they
were
born
forgiving
each
other
.
The
lesson
they
were
teaching
me
in
their
beautiful
turning
was
,
"
Stay
out
of
this
,
Liz
.
Your
part
of
this
relationship
is
over
.
Let
us
work
things
out
from
now
on
.
You
go
on
with
your
life
.
"
