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She
frowned
at
me
through
her
cracked
specs
,
studying
me
with
a
quizzical
look
,
almost
as
if
I
’
d
just
told
her
I
’
d
once
been
a
brunette
and
she
was
trying
to
imagine
it
.
In
the
end
,
she
pronounced
:
"
You
,
married
?
I
cannot
picture
this
.
"
"
But
it
’
s
true
-
I
was
.
"
"
Are
you
the
one
who
ended
the
marriage
?
"
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"
Yes
.
"
She
said
,
"
I
think
it
’
s
most
commendable
that
you
ended
your
marriage
.
You
seem
splendidly
happy
now
.
But
as
for
me
-
how
did
I
get
here
?
Why
was
I
born
an
Indian
girl
?
It
’
s
outrageous
!
Why
did
I
come
into
this
family
?
Why
must
I
attend
so
many
weddings
?
"
Then
Tulsi
ran
around
in
a
frustrated
circle
,
shouting
(
quite
loudly
for
Ashram
standards
)
:
"
I
want
to
live
in
Hawaii
!
!
!
"
Richard
from
Texas
was
married
once
,
too
.
He
had
two
sons
,
both
of
whom
are
grown
men
now
,
both
close
to
their
dad
.
Sometimes
Richard
mentions
his
ex
-
wife
in
some
anecdote
or
other
,
and
he
always
seems
to
speak
of
her
with
fondness
.
I
get
a
bit
envious
whenever
I
hear
this
,
imagining
how
lucky
Richard
is
to
still
be
friends
with
his
former
spouse
,
even
after
separating
.
This
is
an
odd
side
effect
of
my
terrible
divorce
;
whenever
I
hear
of
couples
splitting
amicably
,
I
get
jealous
.
It
’
s
worse
than
that
-
I
’
ve
actually
come
to
think
that
it
’
s
really
romantic
when
a
marriage
ends
civilly
.
Like
,
"
Aw
…
how
sweet
…
they
must
’
ve
really
loved
each
other
…
"
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So
I
asked
Richard
one
day
about
it
.
I
said
,
"
It
seems
like
you
have
fond
feelings
toward
your
ex
-
wife
.
Are
you
two
still
close
?
"
"
Nah
,
"
he
said
casually
.
"
She
thinks
I
changed
my
name
to
Motherfucker
.
"
Richard
’
s
lack
of
concern
about
this
impressed
me
.
My
own
ex
-
spouse
happens
to
think
I
changed
my
name
too
,
and
it
breaks
my
heart
.
One
of
the
hardest
things
about
this
divorce
was
the
fact
that
my
ex
-
husband
never
forgave
me
for
leaving
,
that
it
didn
’
t
matter
how
many
bushels
of
apologies
or
explanations
I
laid
at
his
feet
,
how
much
blame
I
assumed
,
or
how
many
assets
or
acts
of
contrition
I
was
willing
to
offer
him
in
exchange
for
departing
-
he
certainly
was
never
going
to
congratulate
me
and
say
,
"
Hey
,
I
was
so
impressed
with
your
generosity
and
honesty
and
I
just
want
to
tell
you
it
’
s
been
a
great
pleasure
being
divorced
by
you
.
"
No
.
I
was
unredeemable
.
And
this
unredeemed
dark
hole
was
still
inside
me
.