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- Стр. 19/797
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Olivia
leaps
up
and
retrieves
my
jacket
,
which
Grey
takes
from
her
before
she
can
hand
it
to
me
.
He
holds
it
up
and
,
feeling
ridiculously
self
-
conscious
,
I
shrug
it
on
.
Grey
places
his
hands
for
a
moment
on
my
shoulders
.
I
gasp
at
the
contact
.
If
he
notices
my
reaction
,
he
gives
nothing
away
.
His
long
index
finger
presses
the
button
summoning
the
elevator
,
and
we
stand
waiting
—
awkwardly
on
my
part
,
coolly
self
-
possessed
on
his
The
doors
open
,
and
I
hurry
in
,
desperate
to
escape
.
I
really
need
to
get
out
of
here
.
When
I
turn
to
look
at
him
,
he
’
s
gazing
at
me
and
leaning
against
the
doorway
beside
the
elevator
with
one
hand
on
the
wall
.
He
really
is
very
,
very
good
-
looking
.
It
’
s
unnerving
.
“
Anastasia
,
”
he
says
as
a
farewell
.
“
Christian
,
”
I
reply
.
And
mercifully
,
the
doors
close
.
*
*
*
My
heart
is
pounding
.
The
elevator
arrives
on
the
first
floor
,
and
I
scramble
out
as
soon
as
the
doors
slide
open
,
stumbling
once
but
fortunately
not
sprawling
onto
the
immaculate
sandstone
floor
.
I
race
for
the
wide
glass
doors
,
and
suddenly
I
’
m
free
in
the
bracing
,
cleansing
,
damp
air
of
Seattle
.
Raising
my
face
,
I
welcome
the
cool
,
refreshing
rain
.
I
close
my
eyes
and
take
a
deep
,
purifying
breath
,
trying
to
recover
what
’
s
left
of
my
equilibrium
.
No
man
has
ever
affected
me
the
way
Christian
Grey
has
,
and
I
cannot
fathom
why
.
Is
it
his
looks
?
His
civility
?
Wealth
?
Power
?
I
don
’
t
understand
my
irrational
reaction
.
I
breathe
an
enormous
sigh
of
relief
.
What
in
heaven
’
s
name
was
that
all
about
?
Leaning
against
one
of
the
steel
pillars
of
the
building
,
I
valiantly
attempt
to
calm
down
and
gather
my
thoughts
.
I
shake
my
head
.
What
was
that
?
My
heart
steadies
to
its
regular
rhythm
,
and
when
I
can
breathe
normally
again
I
head
for
the
car
.
AS
I
LEAVE
THE
city
limits
behind
,
I
begin
to
feel
foolish
and
embarrassed
as
I
replay
the
interview
in
my
mind
.
Surely
I
’
m
overreacting
to
something
that
’
s
imaginary
.
Okay
,
so
he
’
s
very
attractive
,
confident
,
commanding
,
at
ease
with
himself
—
but
on
the
flip
side
,
he
’
s
arrogant
,
and
for
all
his
impeccable
manners
,
he
’
s
autocratic
and
cold
.
Well
,
on
the
surface
.
An
involuntary
shiver
runs
down
my
spine
.
He
may
be
arrogant
,
but
then
he
has
a
right
to
be
—
he
’
s
accomplished
so
much
at
such
a
young
age
.
He
doesn
’
t
suffer
fools
gladly
,
but
why
should
he
?
Again
,
I
’
m
irritated
that
Kate
didn
’
t
give
me
a
brief
biography
.
While
cruising
toward
Interstate
5
,
my
mind
continues
to
wander
.
I
’
m
truly
perplexed
as
to
what
makes
someone
so
driven
to
succeed
.
Some
of
his
answers
were
so
cryptic
—
as
if
he
had
a
hidden
agenda
.
And
Kate
’
s
questions
—
ugh
!
The
adoption
and
asking
him
if
he
was
gay
!
I
shudder
.
I
can
’
t
believe
I
said
that
.
Ground
,
swallow
me
up
now
!
Every
time
I
think
of
that
question
in
the
future
,
I
will
cringe
with
embarrassment
.
Damn
Katherine
Kavanagh
!
I
check
the
speedometer
.
I
’
m
driving
more
cautiously
than
I
would
on
any
other
occasion
.
And
I
know
it
’
s
the
memory
of
those
penetrating
gray
eyes
gazing
at
me
and
a
stern
voice
telling
me
to
drive
carefully
.
Shaking
my
head
,
I
realize
that
Grey
’
s
more
like
a
man
twice
his
age
.
