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- Джозеф Хеллер
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- Уловка 22
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- Стр. 323/452
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"
General
Peckem
can
’
t
stand
you
either
.
In
fact
,
no
one
can
stand
you
.
Finish
what
you
’
re
doing
,
Danby
,
and
disappear
.
I
’
ll
conduct
the
briefing
.
"
"
Where
’
s
Major
Danby
?
"
Colonel
Cathcart
inquired
,
after
he
had
driven
up
for
the
full
briefing
with
General
Peckem
and
Colonel
Scheisskopf
.
"
He
asked
permission
to
leave
as
soon
as
he
saw
you
driving
up
,
"
answered
Colonel
Korn
.
"
He
’
s
afraid
General
Peckem
doesn
’
t
like
him
.
I
was
going
to
conduct
the
briefing
anyway
.
I
do
a
much
better
job
.
"
"
Splendid
!
"
said
Colonel
Cathcart
.
"
No
!
"
Colonel
Cathcart
countermanded
himself
an
instant
later
when
he
remembered
how
good
a
job
Colonel
Korn
had
done
before
General
Dreedle
at
the
first
Avignon
briefing
.
"
I
’
ll
do
it
myself
.
"
Colonel
Cathcart
braced
himself
with
the
knowledge
that
he
was
one
of
General
Peckem
’
s
favorites
and
took
charge
of
the
meeting
,
snapping
his
words
out
crisply
to
the
attentive
audience
of
subordinate
officers
with
the
bluff
and
dispassionate
toughness
he
had
picked
up
from
General
Dreedle
.
He
knew
he
cut
a
fine
figure
there
on
the
platform
with
his
open
shirt
collar
,
his
cigarette
holder
,
and
his
close
-
cropped
,
gray
-
tipped
curly
black
hair
.
He
breezed
along
beautifully
,
even
emulating
certain
characteristic
mispronunciations
of
General
Dreedle
’
s
,
and
he
was
not
the
least
bit
intimidated
by
General
Peckem
’
s
new
colonel
until
he
suddenly
recalled
that
General
Peckem
detested
General
Dreedle
.
Then
his
voice
cracked
,
and
all
confidence
left
him
.
He
stumbled
ahead
through
instinct
in
burning
humiliation
.
He
was
suddenly
in
terror
of
Colonel
Scheisskopf
.
Another
colonel
in
the
area
meant
another
rival
,
another
enemy
,
another
person
who
hated
him
.
And
this
one
was
tough
!
A
horrifying
thought
occurred
to
Colonel
Cathcart
:
Suppose
Colonel
Scheisskopf
had
already
bribed
all
the
men
in
the
room
to
begin
moaning
,
as
they
had
done
at
the
first
Avignon
mission
.
How
could
he
silence
them
?
What
a
terrible
black
eye
that
would
be
!
Colonel
Cathcart
was
seized
with
such
fright
that
he
almost
beckoned
to
Colonel
Korn
.
Somehow
he
held
himself
together
and
synchronized
the
watches
.
When
he
had
done
that
,
he
knew
he
had
won
,
for
he
could
end
now
at
any
time
.
He
had
come
through
in
a
crisis
.
He
wanted
to
laugh
in
Colonel
Scheisskopf
’
s
face
with
triumph
and
spite
He
had
proved
himself
brilliantly
under
pressure
,
and
he
concluded
the
briefing
with
an
inspiring
peroration
that
every
instinct
told
him
was
a
masterful
exhibition
of
eloquent
tact
and
subtlety
.
"
Now
,
men
,
"
he
exhorted
.
"
We
have
with
us
today
a
very
distinguished
guest
,
General
Peckem
from
Special
Services
,
the
man
who
gives
us
all
our
softball
bats
,
comic
books
and
U
.
S
.
O
.
shows
.
I
want
to
dedicate
this
mission
to
him
.
Go
on
out
there
and
bomb
—
for
me
,
for
your
country
,
for
God
,
and
for
that
great
American
,
General
P
.
P
.
Peckem
.
And
let
’
s
see
you
put
all
those
bombs
on
a
dime
!
’
Yossarian
no
longer
gave
a
damn
where
his
bombs
fell
,
although
he
did
not
go
as
far
as
Dunbar
,
who
dropped
his
bombs
hundreds
of
yards
past
the
village
and
would
face
a
court
-
martial
if
it
could
ever
be
shown
he
had
done
it
deliberately
.
Without
a
word
even
to
Yossarian
,
Dunbar
had
washed
his
hands
of
the
mission
.
The
fall
in
the
hospital
had
either
shown
him
the
light
or
scrambled
his
brains
;
it
was
impossible
to
say
which
.
Dunbar
seldom
laughed
any
more
and
seemed
to
be
wasting
away
.
He
snarled
belligerently
at
superior
officers
,
even
at
Major
Danby
,
and
was
crude
and
surly
and
profane
even
in
front
of
the
chaplain
,
who
was
afraid
of
Dunbar
now
and
seemed
to
be
wasting
away
also
.
The
chaplain
’
s
pilgrimage
to
Wintergreen
had
proved
abortive
;
another
shrine
was
empty
.
Wintergreen
was
too
busy
to
see
the
chaplain
himself
.
A
brash
assistant
brought
the
chaplain
a
stolen
Zippo
cigarette
lighter
as
a
gift
and
informed
him
condescendingly
that
Wintergreen
was
too
deeply
involved
with
wartime
activities
to
concern
himself
with
matters
so
trivial
as
the
number
of
missions
men
had
to
fly
.
The
chaplain
worried
about
Dunbar
and
brooded
more
over
Yossarian
now
that
Orr
was
gone
.
To
the
chaplain
,
who
lived
by
himself
in
a
spacious
tent
whose
pointy
top
sealed
him
in
gloomy
solitude
each
night
like
the
cap
of
a
tomb
,
it
seemed
incredible
that
Yossarian
really
preferred
living
alone
and
wanted
no
roommates
.
As
a
lead
bombardier
again
,
Yossarian
had
McWatt
for
a
pilot
,
and
that
was
one
consolation
,
although
he
was
still
so
utterly
undefended
.
