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"
I
d
like
to
speak
to
him
anyway
.
There
must
be
somebody
who
will
help
you
.
"
"
Do
it
for
Dunbar
,
Chaplain
,
"
Yossarian
corrected
with
a
superior
air
.
"
I
ve
got
this
million
-
dollar
leg
wound
that
will
take
me
out
of
combat
.
If
that
doesn
t
do
it
,
there
s
a
psychiatrist
who
thinks
I
m
not
good
enough
to
be
in
the
Army
.
"
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"
I
m
the
one
who
isn
t
good
enough
to
be
in
the
Army
,
"
Dunbar
whined
jealously
.
"
It
was
my
dream
.
"
"
It
s
not
the
dream
,
Dunbar
,
"
Yossarian
explained
.
"
He
likes
your
dream
.
It
s
my
personality
.
He
thinks
it
s
split
.
"
"
It
s
split
right
down
the
middle
,
"
said
Major
Sanderson
,
who
had
laced
his
lumpy
GI
shoes
for
the
occasion
and
had
slicked
his
charcoal
-
dull
hair
down
with
some
stiffening
and
redolent
tonic
.
He
smiled
ostentatiously
to
show
himself
reasonable
and
nice
.
"
I
m
not
saying
that
to
be
cruel
and
insulting
,
"
he
continued
with
cruel
and
insulting
delight
.
"
I
m
not
saying
it
because
I
hate
you
and
want
revenge
.
I
m
not
saying
it
because
you
rejected
me
and
hurt
my
feelings
terribly
.
No
,
I
m
a
man
of
medicine
and
I
m
being
coldly
objective
.
I
have
very
bad
news
for
you
.
Are
you
man
enough
to
take
it
?
"
"
God
,
no
!
"
screamed
Yossarian
.
"
I
ll
go
right
to
pieces
.
"
Major
Sanderson
flew
instantly
into
a
rage
.
"
Can
t
you
even
do
one
thing
right
?
"
he
pleaded
,
turning
beet
-
red
with
vexation
and
crashing
the
sides
of
both
fists
down
upon
his
desk
together
.
"
The
trouble
with
you
is
that
you
think
you
re
too
good
for
all
the
conventions
of
society
.
You
probably
think
you
re
too
good
for
me
too
,
just
because
I
arrived
at
puberty
late
.
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Well
,
do
you
know
what
you
are
?
You
re
a
frustrated
,
unhappy
,
disillusioned
,
undisciplined
,
maladjusted
young
man
!
"
Major
Sanderson
s
disposition
seemed
to
mellow
as
he
reeled
off
the
uncomplimentary
adjectives
.
"
Yes
,
sir
,
"
Yossarian
agreed
carefully
.
"
I
guess
you
re
right
.
"
"
Of
course
I
m
right
.
You
re
immature
.
You
ve
been
unable
to
adjust
to
the
idea
of
war
.
"