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- Джозеф Хеллер
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- Уловка 22
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"
I
’
m
doing
everything
I
possibly
can
,
"
the
chaplain
explained
softly
to
Yossarian
after
Dobbs
had
departed
.
"
I
even
went
to
the
medical
tent
to
speak
to
Doc
Daneeka
about
helping
you
.
"
"
Yes
,
I
can
see
.
"
Yossarian
suppressed
a
smile
.
"
What
happened
?
"
"
They
painted
my
gums
purple
,
"
the
chaplain
replied
sheepishly
.
"
They
painted
his
toes
purple
,
too
,
"
Nately
added
in
outrage
.
"
And
then
they
gave
him
a
laxative
.
"
"
But
I
went
back
again
this
morning
to
see
him
.
"
"
And
they
painted
his
gums
purple
again
,
"
said
Nately
.
"
But
I
did
get
to
speak
to
him
,
"
the
chaplain
argued
in
a
plaintive
tone
of
self
-
justification
.
"
Doctor
Daneeka
seems
like
such
an
unhappy
man
.
He
suspects
that
someone
is
plotting
to
transfer
him
to
the
Pacific
Ocean
.
All
this
time
he
’
s
been
thinking
of
coming
to
me
for
help
.
When
I
told
him
I
needed
his
help
,
he
wondered
if
there
wasn
’
t
a
chaplain
I
couldn
’
t
go
see
.
"
The
chaplain
waited
in
patient
dejection
when
Yossarian
and
Dunbar
both
broke
into
laughter
.
"
I
used
to
think
it
was
immoral
to
be
unhappy
,
"
he
continued
,
as
though
keening
aloud
in
solitude
.
"
Now
I
don
’
t
know
what
to
think
any
more
.
I
’
d
like
to
make
the
subject
of
immorality
the
basis
of
my
sermon
this
Sunday
,
but
I
’
m
not
sure
I
ought
to
give
any
sermon
at
all
with
these
purple
gums
.
Colonel
Korn
was
very
displeased
with
them
.
"
"
Chaplain
,
why
don
’
t
you
come
into
the
hospital
with
us
for
a
while
and
take
it
easy
?
"
Yossarian
invited
.
"
You
could
be
very
comfortable
here
.
"
The
brash
iniquity
of
the
proposal
tempted
and
amused
the
chaplain
for
a
second
or
two
.
"
No
,
I
don
’
t
think
so
,
"
he
decided
reluctantly
.
"
I
want
to
arrange
for
a
trip
to
the
mainland
to
see
a
mail
clerk
named
Wintergreen
.
Doctor
Daneeka
told
me
he
could
help
.
"
"
Wintergreen
is
probably
the
most
influential
man
in
the
whole
theater
of
operations
.
He
’
s
not
only
a
mail
clerk
,
but
he
has
access
to
a
mimeograph
machine
.
But
he
won
’
t
help
anybody
.
That
’
s
one
of
the
reasons
he
’
ll
go
far
.
"
