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- Джозеф Хеллер
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- Уловка 22
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- Стр. 191/452
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"
"
And
don
’
t
tell
me
God
works
in
mysterious
ways
,
"
Yossarian
continued
,
hurtling
on
over
her
objection
.
"
There
’
s
nothing
so
mysterious
about
it
.
He
’
s
not
working
at
all
.
He
’
s
playing
.
Or
else
He
’
s
forgotten
all
about
us
.
That
’
s
the
kind
of
God
you
people
talk
about
—
a
country
bumpkin
,
a
clumsy
,
bungling
,
brainless
,
conceited
,
uncouth
hayseed
.
Good
God
,
how
much
reverence
can
you
have
for
a
Supreme
Being
who
finds
it
necessary
to
include
such
phenomena
as
phlegm
and
tooth
decay
in
His
divine
system
of
creation
?
What
in
the
world
was
running
through
that
warped
,
evil
,
scatological
mind
of
His
when
He
robbed
old
people
of
the
power
to
control
their
bowel
movements
?
Why
in
the
world
did
He
ever
create
pain
?
"
"
Pain
?
"
Lieutenant
Scheisskopf
’
s
wife
pounced
upon
the
word
victoriously
.
"
Pain
is
a
useful
symptom
.
Pain
is
a
warning
to
us
of
bodily
dangers
.
"
"
And
who
created
the
dangers
?
"
Yossarian
demanded
.
He
laughed
caustically
.
"
Oh
,
He
was
really
being
charitable
to
us
when
He
gave
us
pain
!
Why
couldn
’
t
He
have
used
a
doorbell
instead
to
notify
us
,
or
one
of
His
celestial
choirs
?
Or
a
system
of
blue
-
and
-
red
neon
tubes
right
in
the
middle
of
each
person
’
s
forehead
.
Any
jukebox
manufacturer
worth
his
salt
could
have
done
that
.
Why
couldn
’
t
He
?
"
"
People
would
certainly
look
silly
walking
around
with
red
neon
tubes
in
the
middle
of
their
foreheads
.
"
"
They
certainly
look
beautiful
now
writhing
in
agony
or
stupefied
with
morphine
,
don
’
t
they
?
What
a
colossal
,
immortal
blunderer
!
When
you
consider
the
opportunity
and
power
He
had
to
really
do
a
job
,
and
then
look
at
the
stupid
,
ugly
little
mess
He
made
of
it
instead
,
His
sheer
incompetence
is
almost
staggering
.
It
’
s
obvious
He
never
met
a
payroll
.
Why
,
no
self
-
respecting
businessman
would
hire
a
bungler
like
Him
as
even
a
shipping
clerk
!
"
Lieutenant
Scheisskopf
’
s
wife
had
turned
ashen
in
disbelief
and
was
ogling
him
with
alarm
.
"
You
’
d
better
not
talk
that
way
about
Him
,
honey
,
"
she
warned
him
reprovingly
in
a
low
and
hostile
voice
.
"
He
might
punish
you
.
"
"
Isn
’
t
He
punishing
me
enough
?
"
Yossarian
snorted
resentfully
.
"
You
know
,
we
mustn
’
t
let
Him
get
away
with
it
.
Oh
,
no
,
we
certainly
mustn
’
t
let
Him
get
away
scot
free
for
all
the
sorrow
He
’
s
caused
us
.
Someday
I
’
m
going
to
make
Him
pay
.
I
know
when
.
On
the
Judgment
Day
.
Yes
,
That
’
s
the
day
I
’
ll
be
close
enough
to
reach
out
and
grab
that
little
yokel
by
His
neck
and
—
"
"
Stop
it
!
Stop
it
!
"
Lieutenant
Scheisskopf
’
s
wife
screamed
suddenly
,
and
began
beating
him
ineffectually
about
the
head
with
both
fists
.
"
Stop
it
!
"
Yossarian
ducked
behind
his
arm
for
protection
while
she
slammed
away
at
him
in
feminine
fury
for
a
few
seconds
,
and
then
he
caught
her
determinedly
by
the
wrists
and
forced
her
gently
back
down
on
the
bed
.
"
What
the
hell
are
you
getting
so
upset
about
?
"
he
asked
her
bewilderedly
in
a
tone
of
contrite
amusement
.
"
I
thought
you
didn
’
t
believe
in
God
.
"
