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That
was
the
uneasy
corner
of
Lydgate
’
s
consciousness
while
he
was
reviewing
the
facts
and
resisting
all
reproach
.
If
he
had
been
independent
,
this
matter
of
a
patient
’
s
treatment
and
the
distinct
rule
that
he
must
do
or
see
done
that
which
he
believed
best
for
the
life
committed
to
him
,
would
have
been
the
point
on
which
he
would
have
been
the
sturdiest
.
As
it
was
,
he
had
rested
in
the
consideration
that
disobedience
to
his
orders
,
however
it
might
have
arisen
,
could
not
be
considered
a
crime
,
that
in
the
dominant
opinion
obedience
to
his
orders
was
just
as
likely
to
be
fatal
,
and
that
the
affair
was
simply
one
of
etiquette
.
Whereas
,
again
and
again
,
in
his
time
of
freedom
,
he
had
denounced
the
perversion
of
pathological
doubt
into
moral
doubt
and
had
said
—
"
the
purest
experiment
in
treatment
may
still
be
conscientious
:
my
business
is
to
take
care
of
life
,
and
to
do
the
best
I
can
think
of
for
it
.
Science
is
properly
more
scrupulous
than
dogma
.
Dogma
gives
a
charter
to
mistake
,
but
the
very
breath
of
science
is
a
contest
with
mistake
,
and
must
keep
the
conscience
alive
.
"
Alas
!
the
scientific
conscience
had
got
into
the
debasing
company
of
money
obligation
and
selfish
respects
.
"
Is
there
a
medical
man
of
them
all
in
Middlemarch
who
would
question
himself
as
I
do
?
"
said
poor
Lydgate
,
with
a
renewed
outburst
of
rebellion
against
the
oppression
of
his
lot
.
"
And
yet
they
will
all
feel
warranted
in
making
a
wide
space
between
me
and
them
,
as
if
I
were
a
leper
!
My
practice
and
my
reputation
are
utterly
damned
—
I
can
see
that
.
Even
if
I
could
be
cleared
by
valid
evidence
,
it
would
make
little
difference
to
the
blessed
world
here
.
I
have
been
set
down
as
tainted
and
should
be
cheapened
to
them
all
the
same
.
"
Already
there
had
been
abundant
signs
which
had
hitherto
puzzled
him
,
that
just
when
he
had
been
paying
off
his
debts
and
getting
cheerfully
on
his
feet
,
the
townsmen
were
avoiding
him
or
looking
strangely
.
at
him
,
and
in
two
instances
it
came
to
his
knowledge
that
patients
of
his
had
called
in
another
practitioner
.
The
reasons
were
too
plain
now
.
The
general
black
-
balling
had
begun
.
No
wonder
that
in
Lydgate
’
s
energetic
nature
the
sense
of
a
hopeless
misconstruction
easily
turned
into
a
dogged
resistance
.
The
scowl
which
occasionally
showed
itself
on
his
square
brow
was
not
a
meaningless
accident
.
Already
when
he
was
re
-
entering
the
town
after
that
ride
taken
in
the
first
hours
of
stinging
pain
,
he
was
setting
his
mind
on
remaining
in
Middlemarch
in
spite
of
the
worst
that
could
be
done
against
him
.
He
would
not
retreat
before
calumny
,
as
if
he
submitted
to
it
.
He
would
face
it
to
the
utmost
,
and
no
act
of
his
should
show
that
he
was
afraid
.
It
belonged
to
the
generosity
as
well
as
defiant
force
of
his
nature
that
he
resolved
not
to
shrink
from
showing
to
the
full
his
sense
of
obligation
to
Bulstrode
It
was
true
that
the
association
with
this
man
had
been
fatal
to
him
—
true
that
if
he
had
had
the
thousand
pounds
still
in
his
hands
with
all
his
debts
unpaid
he
would
have
returned
the
money
to
Bulstrode
,
and
taken
beggary
rather
than
the
rescue
which
had
been
sullied
with
the
suspicion
of
a
bribe
(
for
,
remember
,
he
was
one
of
the
proudest
among
the
sons
of
men
)
—
nevertheless
,
he
would
not
turn
away
from
this
crushed
fellow
-
mortal
whose
aid
he
had
used
,
and
make
a
pitiful
effort
to
get
acquittal
for
himself
by
howling
against
another
.
"
I
shall
do
as
I
think
right
,
and
explain
to
nobody
.
They
will
try
to
starve
me
out
,
but
—
"
he
was
going
on
with
an
obstinate
resolve
,
but
he
was
getting
near
home
,
and
the
thought
of
Rosamond
urged
itself
again
into
that
chief
place
from
which
it
had
been
thrust
by
the
agonized
struggles
of
wounded
honor
and
pride
.
How
would
Rosamond
take
it
all
?
Here
was
another
weight
of
chain
to
drag
,
and
poor
Lydgate
was
in
a
bad
mood
for
bearing
her
dumb
mastery
.
He
had
no
impulse
to
tell
her
the
trouble
which
must
soon
be
common
to
them
both
.
He
preferred
waiting
for
the
incidental
disclosure
which
events
must
soon
bring
about
.
"
Mercifully
grant
that
we
may
grow
aged
together
.
"
—
Book
OF
TOBIT
:
Marriage
Prayer
.
In
Middlemarch
a
wife
could
not
long
remain
ignorant
that
the
town
held
a
bad
opinion
of
her
husband
.
No
feminine
intimate
might
carry
her
friendship
so
far
as
to
make
a
plain
statement
to
the
wife
of
the
unpleasant
fact
known
or
believed
about
her
husband
;
but
when
a
woman
with
her
thoughts
much
at
leisure
got
them
suddenly
employed
on
something
grievously
disadvantageous
to
her
neighbors
,
various
moral
impulses
were
called
into
play
which
tended
to
stimulate
utterance
.
Candor
was
one
.
To
be
candid
,
in
Middlemarch
phraseology
,
meant
,
to
use
an
early
opportunity
of
letting
your
friends
know
that
you
did
not
take
a
cheerful
view
of
their
capacity
,
their
conduct
,
or
their
position
;
and
a
robust
candor
never
waited
to
be
asked
for
its
opinion
.
Then
,
again
,
there
was
the
love
of
truth
—
a
wide
phrase
,
but
meaning
in
this
relation
,
a
lively
objection
to
seeing
a
wife
look
happier
than
her
husband
’
s
character
warranted
,
or
manifest
too
much
satisfaction
in
her
lot
—
the
poor
thing
should
have
some
hint
given
her
that
if
she
knew
the
truth
she
would
have
less
complacency
in
her
bonnet
,
and
in
light
dishes
for
a
supper
-
party
.
