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So
many
betray
themselves
before
they
are
betrayed
,
with
a
kind
of
wistful
hunger
for
glory
,
even
the
glory
of
punishment
.
Andersen
’
s
Well
is
the
only
confidant
to
trust
—
Andersen
’
s
Well
.
I
called
out
to
old
Cap
’
n
.
"
Shall
I
set
the
course
,
sir
?
Is
it
a
good
course
?
Will
it
get
me
there
?
"
And
for
the
first
time
he
denied
me
his
command
.
"
You
’
ll
have
to
work
it
out
yourself
.
What
’
s
good
for
one
is
bad
for
another
,
and
you
won
’
t
know
till
after
.
"
The
old
bastard
might
have
helped
me
then
,
but
perhaps
it
wouldn
’
t
have
made
any
difference
.
No
one
wants
advice
—
only
corroboration
.
When
I
awakened
,
old
sleepy
Mary
was
up
and
gone
and
coffee
and
bacon
were
afoot
.
I
could
smell
them
.
And
you
’
d
have
to
search
for
a
better
day
for
a
resurrection
,
a
green
and
blue
and
yellow
day
.
From
the
bedroom
window
I
could
see
that
everything
was
resurrecting
,
grass
,
trees
.
They
chose
a
proper
season
for
it
.
I
put
on
my
Christmas
dressing
gown
and
my
birthday
slippers
.
In
the
bathroom
I
found
some
of
Allen
’
s
hair
goo
and
slicked
it
on
,
so
that
my
combed
and
brushed
scalp
felt
tight
like
a
cap
.
Easter
Sunday
breakfast
is
an
orgy
of
eggs
and
pancakes
,
and
bacon
curling
about
everything
.
I
crept
up
on
Mary
and
patted
her
silk
-
covered
fanny
and
said
,
"
Kyrie
eleison
!
"
"
Oh
!
"
she
said
.
"
I
didn
’
t
hear
you
coming
.
"
She
regarded
my
dressing
gown
,
paisley
pattern
.
"
Nice
,
"
she
said
.
"
You
don
’
t
wear
it
enough
.
"
"
I
haven
’
t
time
.
I
haven
’
t
had
time
.
"
"
Well
,
it
’
s
nice
,
"
she
said
.
"
Ought
to
be
.
You
picked
it
.
Are
the
kids
sleeping
through
these
wonderful
smells
?
"
