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I
can
see
what
you
are
,
I
said
.
Don
’
t
you
think
I
can
’
t
.
I
sounded
sharp
,
I
’
d
had
enough
.
She
looked
round
quick
,
then
bent
down
,
her
hands
covering
her
face
.
I
think
she
was
pretending
to
cry
a
bit
.
Well
in
the
end
she
said
in
a
very
quiet
voice
,
"
Please
take
me
down
.
"
So
down
we
went
.
She
turned
when
she
was
inside
and
I
was
going
to
go
,
having
removed
her
cords
.
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"
We
’
ve
been
naked
in
front
of
each
other
,
"
she
said
.
"
We
can
’
t
be
further
apart
.
"
I
was
like
mad
when
I
got
out
.
I
can
’
t
explain
.
I
didn
’
t
sleep
the
whole
night
.
It
kept
on
coming
back
,
me
standing
and
lying
there
with
no
clothes
on
,
the
way
I
acted
and
what
she
must
think
.
I
could
just
see
her
laughing
at
me
down
there
.
Every
time
I
thought
about
it
,
it
was
like
my
whole
body
went
red
.
I
didn
’
t
want
the
night
to
end
.
I
wanted
it
to
stay
dark
for
ever
.
I
walked
about
upstairs
for
hours
.
In
the
end
I
got
the
van
out
and
drove
down
to
the
sea
,
real
fast
,
I
didn
’
t
care
what
happened
.
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I
could
have
done
anything
.
I
could
have
killed
her
.
All
I
did
later
was
because
of
that
night
.
It
was
almost
like
she
was
stupid
,
plain
stupid
.
Of
course
she
wasn
’
t
really
,
it
was
just
that
she
didn
’
t
see
how
to
love
me
in
the
right
way
.
There
were
a
lot
of
ways
she
could
have
pleased
me
.
She
was
like
all
women
,
she
had
a
one
-
track
mind
.