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- Джон Фоулз
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I
know
I
was
weak
.
I
should
have
told
her
straight
out
not
to
be
disgusting
.
I
was
very
weak
.
It
was
like
I
was
drawn
on
against
my
will
.
She
laid
her
head
again
so
I
couldn
’
t
see
her
face
.
"
Am
I
the
first
girl
you
’
ve
ever
kissed
?
"
Don
’
t
be
daft
.
"
Just
relax
.
Don
’
t
be
nervous
,
don
’
t
be
ashamed
.
"
Then
she
turned
and
was
kissing
me
again
,
her
eyes
shut
.
Of
course
she
’
d
had
three
glasses
of
sherry
.
What
happened
then
was
most
embarrassing
,
I
began
to
feel
very
worked
up
and
I
always
understood
(
from
something
I
heard
in
the
army
)
that
a
gentleman
always
controls
himself
to
the
right
moment
and
so
I
just
didn
’
t
know
what
to
do
.
I
thought
she
would
be
offended
and
so
I
tried
to
sit
upright
more
when
she
took
her
mouth
away
.
"
What
’
s
wrong
.
Am
I
hurting
you
?
"
Yes
,
I
said
.
She
moved
off
my
knees
then
,
she
unhooked
her
arms
from
my
head
,
but
she
still
sat
very
close
.
