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- Джером Дэвид Сэлинджер
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Then
we
shook
hands
.
And
all
that
crap
.
It
made
me
feel
sad
as
hell
,
though
.
"
I
'll
drop
you
a
line
,
sir
.
Take
care
of
your
grippe
,
now
.
"
"
Good-by
,
boy
.
"
After
I
shut
the
door
and
started
back
to
the
living
room
,
he
yelled
something
at
me
,
but
I
could
n't
exactly
hear
him
.
I
'm
pretty
sure
he
yelled
"
Good
luck
!
"
at
me
.
I
hope
to
hell
not
.
I
'd
never
yell
"
Good
luck
!
"
at
anybody
.
It
sounds
terrible
,
when
you
think
about
it
.
I
'm
the
most
terrific
liar
you
ever
saw
in
your
life
.
It
's
awful
.
If
I
'm
on
my
way
to
the
store
to
buy
a
magazine
,
even
,
and
somebody
asks
me
where
I
'm
going
,
I
'm
liable
to
say
I
'm
going
to
the
opera
.
It
's
terrible
.
So
when
I
told
old
Spencer
I
had
to
go
to
the
gym
and
get
my
equipment
and
stuff
,
that
was
a
sheer
lie
.
I
do
n't
even
keep
my
goddam
equipment
in
the
gym
.
Where
I
lived
at
Pencey
,
I
lived
in
the
Ossenburger
Memorial
Wing
of
the
new
dorms
.
It
was
only
for
juniors
and
seniors
.
I
was
a
junior
.
My
roommate
was
a
senior
.
It
was
named
after
this
guy
Ossenburger
that
went
to
Pencey
.
He
made
a
pot
of
dough
in
the
undertaking
business
after
he
got
out
of
Pencey
.
What
he
did
,
he
started
these
undertaking
parlors
all
over
the
country
that
you
could
get
members
of
your
family
buried
for
about
five
bucks
apiece
.
You
should
see
old
Ossenburger
.
He
probably
just
shoves
them
in
a
sack
and
dumps
them
in
the
river
.
Anyway
,
he
gave
Pencey
a
pile
of
dough
,
and
they
named
our
wing
alter
him
.
The
first
football
game
of
the
year
,
he
came
up
to
school
in
this
big
goddam
Cadillac
,
and
we
all
had
to
stand
up
in
the
grandstand
and
give
him
a
locomotive
--
that
's
a
cheer
.
Then
,
the
next
morning
,
in
chapel
,
be
made
a
speech
that
lasted
about
ten
hours
.
He
started
off
with
about
fifty
corny
jokes
,
just
to
show
us
what
a
regular
guy
he
was
.
Very
big
deal
.
Then
he
started
telling
us
how
he
was
never
ashamed
,
when
he
was
in
some
kind
of
trouble
or
something
,
to
get
right
down
his
knees
and
pray
to
God
.
He
told
us
we
should
always
pray
to
God
--
talk
to
Him
and
all
--
wherever
we
were
.
He
told
us
we
ought
to
think
of
Jesus
as
our
buddy
and
all
.
He
said
he
talked
to
Jesus
all
the
time
.
Even
when
he
was
driving
his
car
.
That
killed
me
.
I
just
see
the
big
phony
bastard
shifting
into
first
gear
and
asking
Jesus
to
send
him
a
few
more
stiffs
.
The
only
good
part
of
his
speech
was
right
in
the
middle
of
it
.
He
was
telling
us
all
about
what
a
swell
guy
he
was
,
what
a
hot-shot
and
all
,
then
all
of
a
sudden
this
guy
sitting
in
the
row
in
front
of
me
,
Edgar
Marsalla
,
laid
this
terrific
fart
.
It
was
a
very
crude
thing
to
do
,
in
chapel
and
all
,
but
it
was
also
quite
amusing
.
Old
Marsalla
.
He
damn
near
blew
the
roof
off
.
Hardly
anybody
laughed
out
loud
,
and
old
Ossenburger
made
out
like
he
did
n't
even
hear
it
,
but
old
Thurmer
,
the
headmaster
,
was
sitting
right
next
to
him
on
the
rostrum
and
all
,
and
you
could
tell
he
heard
it
.
Boy
,
was
he
sore
.
He
did
n't
say
anything
then
,
but
the
next
night
he
made
us
have
compulsory
study
hall
in
the
academic
building
and
he
came
up
and
made
a
speech
.
He
said
that
the
boy
that
had
created
the
disturbance
in
chapel
was
n't
fit
to
go
to
Pencey
.
We
tried
to
get
old
Marsalla
to
rip
off
another
one
,
right
while
old
Thurmer
was
making
his
speech
,
but
he
was
n't
in
the
right
mood
.
Anyway
,
that
's
where
I
lived
at
Pencey
.
Old
Ossenburger
Memorial
Wing
,
in
the
new
dorms
.
It
was
pretty
nice
to
get
back
to
my
room
,
after
I
left
old
Spencer
,
because
everybody
was
down
at
the
game
,
and
the
heat
was
on
in
our
room
,
for
a
change
.
It
felt
sort
of
cosy
.
I
took
off
my
coat
and
my
tie
and
unbuttoned
my
shirt
collar
;
and
then
I
put
on
this
hat
that
I
'd
bought
in
New
York
that
morning
.
It
was
this
red
hunting
hat
,
with
one
of
those
very
,
very
long
peaks
.
I
saw
it
in
the
window
of
this
sports
store
when
we
got
out
of
the
subway
,
just
after
I
noticed
I
'd
lost
all
the
goddam
foils
.
It
only
cost
me
a
buck
.
The
way
I
wore
it
,
I
swung
the
old
peak
way
around
to
the
back
--
very
corny
,
I
'll
admit
,
but
I
liked
it
that
way
.
I
looked
good
in
it
that
way
.
Then
I
got
this
book
I
was
reading
and
sat
down
in
my
chair
.
There
were
two
chairs
in
every
room
.
I
had
one
and
my
roommate
,
Ward
Stradlater
,
had
one
.
The
arms
were
in
sad
shape
,
because
everybody
was
always
sitting
on
them
,
but
they
were
pretty
comfortable
chairs
.
The
book
I
was
reading
was
this
book
I
took
out
of
the
library
by
mistake
.
They
gave
me
the
wrong
book
,
and
I
did
n't
notice
it
till
I
got
back
to
my
room
.
They
gave
me
Out
of
Africa
,
by
Isak
Dinesen
.
I
thought
it
was
going
to
stink
,
but
it
did
n't
.
It
was
a
very
good
book
.
I
'm
quite
illiterate
,
but
I
read
a
lot
.
My
favorite
author
is
my
brother
D.
B.
,
and
my
next
favorite
is
Ring
Lardner
.
My
brother
gave
me
a
book
by
Ring
Lardner
for
my
birthday
,
just
before
I
went
to
Pencey
.
It
had
these
very
funny
,
crazy
plays
in
it
,
and
then
it
had
this
one
story
about
a
traffic
cop
that
falls
in
love
with
this
very
cute
girl
that
's
always
speeding
.
Only
,
he
's
married
,
the
cop
,
so
be
ca
n't
marry
her
or
anything
.
Then
this
girl
gets
killed
,
because
she
's
always
speeding
.
That
story
just
about
killed
me
.
What
I
like
best
is
a
book
that
's
at
least
funny
once
in
a
while
.
I
read
a
lot
of
classical
books
,
like
The
Return
of
the
Native
and
all
,
and
I
like
them
,
and
I
read
a
lot
of
war
books
and
mysteries
and
all
,
but
they
do
n't
knock
me
out
too
much
.
What
really
knocks
me
out
is
a
book
that
,
when
you
're
all
done
reading
it
,
you
wish
the
author
that
wrote
it
was
a
terrific
friend
of
yours
and
you
could
call
him
up
on
the
phone
whenever
you
felt
like
it
.
That
does
n't
happen
much
,
though
.
I
would
n't
mind
calling
this
Isak
Dinesen
up
.
And
Ring
Lardner
,
except
that
D.
B.
told
me
he
's
dead
.
You
take
that
book
Of
Human
Bondage
,
by
Somerset
Maugham
,
though
.
I
read
it
last
summer
.
It
's
a
pretty
good
book
and
all
,
but
I
would
n't
want
to
call
Somerset
Maugham
up
.
I
do
n't
know
,
He
just
is
n't
the
kind
of
guy
I
'd
want
to
call
up
,
that
's
all
.
I
'd
rather
call
old
Thomas
Hardy
up
.
I
like
that
Eustacia
Vye
.
