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- Цветы для Элджернона
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When
I
woke
up
,
I
thought
of
Alice
,
and
I
had
the
same
feeling
of
panic
as
in
the
dream
.
What
am
I
afraid
of
?
Something
about
the
knife
.
I
made
myself
a
cup
of
coffee
and
smoked
a
cigarette
.
I
’
d
never
had
a
dream
like
it
before
,
and
I
knew
it
was
connected
with
my
evening
with
Alice
.
I
have
begun
to
think
of
her
in
a
different
way
.
Free
association
is
still
difficult
,
because
it
’
s
hard
not
to
control
the
direction
of
your
thoughts
.
.
.
just
to
leave
your
mind
open
and
let
anything
flow
into
it
.
.
.
ideas
bubbling
to
the
surface
like
a
bubble
bath
.
.
.
a
woman
bathing
.
.
.
a
girl
.
.
.
Norma
taking
a
bath
.
.
.
I
am
watching
through
the
keyhole
.
.
.
and
when
she
gets
out
of
the
tub
to
dry
herself
I
see
that
her
body
is
different
from
mine
.
Something
is
missing
.
Running
down
the
hallway
.
.
.
somebody
chasing
me
.
.
.
not
a
person
.
.
.
just
a
big
flashing
kitchen
knife
.
.
.
and
I
’
m
scared
and
crying
but
no
voice
comes
out
because
my
neck
is
cut
and
I
’
m
bleeding
.
.
.
"
Mama
,
Charlie
is
peeking
at
me
through
the
key
hole
.
.
.
"
Why
is
she
different
?
What
happened
to
her
?
.
.
.
blood
.
.
.
bleeding
.
.
.
a
dark
cubbyhole
.
.
.
Three
blind
mice
.
.
.
three
blind
mice
,
See
how
they
run
!
See
how
they
run
!
They
all
run
after
the
farmer
s
wife
,
She
cut
off
their
tails
with
.
a
carving
knife
,
Did
you
ever
see
such
a
sight
in
your
life
,
As
three
.
.
.
blind
.
.
.
mice
?
Charlie
,
alone
in
the
kitchen
early
in
the
morning
.
Everyone
else
asleep
,
and
he
amuses
himself
playing
with
his
spinner
.
One
of
the
buttons
pops
off
his
shirt
as
he
bends
over
,
and
it
rolls
across
the
intricate
line
-
pattern
of
the
kitchen
linoleum
.
It
rolls
towards
the
bathroom
and
he
follows
,
but
then
he
loses
it
.
Where
is
the
button
?
He
goes
into
the
bathroom
to
find
it
.
There
is
a
closet
in
the
bath
room
where
the
clothes
hamper
is
,
and
he
likes
to
take
out
all
the
clothes
and
look
at
them
.
His
father
’
s
things
and
his
mother
’
s
.
.
.
and
Norma
’
s
dresses
.
He
would
like
to
try
them
on
and
make
believe
he
is
Norma
,
but
once
when
he
did
that
his
mother
spanked
him
for
it
.
There
in
the
clothes
hamper
he
finds
Norma
’
s
underwear
with
dried
blood
.
What
had
she
done
wrong
?
He
was
terrified
.
Who
ever
had
done
it
might
come
looking
for
him
.
.
.
.
Why
does
a
memory
like
that
from
childhood
remain
with
me
so
strongly
,
and
why
does
it
frighten
me
now
?
Is
it
because
of
my
feelings
for
Alice
?
Thinking
about
it
now
,
I
can
understand
why
I
was
taught
to
keep
away
from
women
.
It
was
wrong
for
me
to
express
my
feelings
to
Alice
.
I
have
no
right
to
think
of
a
woman
that
way
—
not
yet
.
