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- Чарльз Диккенс
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- Большие ожидания
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- Стр. 314/435
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A
new
fear
had
been
engendered
in
my
mind
by
his
narrative
;
or
rather
,
his
narrative
had
given
form
and
purpose
to
the
fear
that
was
already
there
.
If
Compeyson
were
alive
and
should
discover
his
return
,
I
could
hardly
doubt
the
consequence
.
That
,
Compeyson
stood
in
mortal
fear
of
him
,
neither
of
the
two
could
know
much
better
than
I
;
and
that
any
such
man
as
that
man
had
been
described
to
be
would
hesitate
to
release
himself
for
good
from
a
dreaded
enemy
by
the
safe
means
of
becoming
an
informer
was
scarcely
to
be
imagined
.
Never
had
I
breathed
,
and
never
would
I
breathe
—
or
so
I
resolved
—
a
word
of
Estella
to
Provis
.
But
,
I
said
to
Herbert
that
,
before
I
could
go
abroad
,
I
must
see
both
Estella
and
Miss
Havisham
.
This
was
when
we
were
left
alone
on
the
night
of
the
day
when
Provis
told
us
his
story
.
I
resolved
to
go
out
to
Richmond
next
day
,
and
I
went
.
On
my
presenting
myself
at
Mrs
.
Brandley
’
s
,
Estella
’
s
maid
was
called
to
tell
that
Estella
had
gone
into
the
country
.
Where
?
To
Satis
House
,
as
usual
.
Not
as
usual
,
I
said
,
for
she
had
never
yet
gone
there
without
me
;
when
was
she
coming
back
?
There
was
an
air
of
reservation
in
the
answer
which
increased
my
perplexity
,
and
the
answer
was
,
that
her
maid
believed
she
was
only
coming
back
at
all
for
a
little
while
.
I
could
make
nothing
of
this
,
except
that
it
was
meant
that
I
should
make
nothing
of
it
,
and
I
went
home
again
in
complete
discomfiture
.
Another
night
consultation
with
Herbert
after
Provis
was
gone
home
(
I
always
took
him
home
,
and
always
looked
well
about
me
)
,
led
us
to
the
conclusion
that
nothing
should
be
said
about
going
abroad
until
I
came
back
from
Miss
Havisham
’
s
.
In
the
mean
time
,
Herbert
and
I
were
to
consider
separately
what
it
would
be
best
to
say
;
whether
we
should
devise
any
pretence
of
being
afraid
that
he
was
under
suspicious
observation
;
or
whether
I
,
who
had
never
yet
been
abroad
,
should
propose
an
expedition
.
We
both
knew
that
I
had
but
to
propose
anything
,
and
he
would
consent
.
We
agreed
that
his
remaining
many
days
in
his
present
hazard
was
not
to
be
thought
of
.
Next
day
I
had
the
meanness
to
feign
that
I
was
under
a
binding
promise
to
go
down
to
Joe
;
but
I
was
capable
of
almost
any
meanness
towards
Joe
or
his
name
.
Provis
was
to
be
strictly
careful
while
I
was
gone
,
and
Herbert
was
to
take
the
charge
of
him
that
I
had
taken
.
I
was
to
be
absent
only
one
night
,
and
,
on
my
return
,
the
gratification
of
his
impatience
for
my
starting
as
a
gentleman
on
a
greater
scale
was
to
be
begun
.
It
occurred
to
me
then
,
and
as
I
afterwards
found
to
Herbert
also
,
that
he
might
be
best
got
away
across
the
water
,
on
that
pretence
—
as
,
to
make
purchases
,
or
the
like
.
Having
thus
cleared
the
way
for
my
expedition
to
Miss
Havisham
’
s
,
I
set
off
by
the
early
morning
coach
before
it
was
yet
light
,
and
was
out
on
the
open
country
road
when
the
day
came
creeping
on
,
halting
and
whimpering
and
shivering
,
and
wrapped
in
patches
of
cloud
and
rags
of
mist
,
like
a
beggar
.
When
we
drove
up
to
the
Blue
Boar
after
a
drizzly
ride
,
whom
should
I
see
come
out
under
the
gateway
,
toothpick
in
hand
,
to
look
at
the
coach
,
but
Bentley
Drummle
!
As
he
pretended
not
to
see
me
,
I
pretended
not
to
see
him
.
It
was
a
very
lame
pretence
on
both
sides
;
the
lamer
,
because
we
both
went
into
the
coffee
-
room
,
where
he
had
just
finished
his
breakfast
,
and
where
I
ordered
mine
.
It
was
poisonous
to
me
to
see
him
in
the
town
,
for
I
very
well
knew
why
he
had
come
there
.
Pretending
to
read
a
smeary
newspaper
long
out
of
date
,
which
had
nothing
half
so
legible
in
its
local
news
,
as
the
foreign
matter
of
coffee
,
pickles
,
fish
sauces
,
gravy
,
melted
butter
,
and
wine
with
which
it
was
sprinkled
all
over
,
as
if
it
had
taken
the
measles
in
a
highly
irregular
form
,
I
sat
at
my
table
while
he
stood
before
the
fire
.
By
degrees
it
became
an
enormous
injury
to
me
that
he
stood
before
the
fire
.
And
I
got
up
,
determined
to
have
my
share
of
it
.
