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- Айн Рэнд
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- Стр. 400/1581
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He
dropped
back
on
the
pillow
and
lay
still
,
his
eyes
closed
.
His
face
seemed
young
,
at
peace
.
Seeing
it
for
a
moment
without
the
reins
of
tension
,
she
realized
suddenly
the
extent
of
the
unhappiness
he
had
borne
;
but
it
’
s
past
now
,
she
thought
,
it
’
s
over
.
He
got
up
,
not
looking
at
her
.
His
face
was
blank
and
closed
again
.
He
picked
up
his
clothes
from
the
floor
and
proceeded
to
dress
,
standing
in
the
middle
of
the
room
,
half
-
turned
away
from
her
.
He
acted
,
not
as
if
she
wasn
’
t
present
,
but
as
if
it
did
not
matter
that
she
was
.
His
movements
,
as
he
buttoned
his
shirt
,
as
he
buckled
the
belt
of
his
slacks
,
had
the
rapid
precision
of
performing
a
duty
.
She
lay
back
on
the
pillow
,
watching
him
,
enjoying
the
sight
of
his
figure
in
motion
.
She
liked
the
gray
slacks
and
shirt
—
the
expert
mechanic
of
the
John
Galt
Line
,
she
thought
,
in
the
stripes
of
sunlight
and
shadow
,
like
a
convict
behind
bars
.
But
they
were
not
bars
any
longer
,
they
were
the
cracks
of
a
wall
which
the
John
Galt
Line
had
broken
,
the
advance
notice
of
what
awaited
them
outside
,
beyond
the
Venetian
blinds
—
she
thought
of
the
trip
back
,
on
the
new
rail
,
with
the
first
train
from
Wyatt
Junction
—
the
trip
back
to
her
office
in
the
Taggart
Building
and
to
all
the
things
now
open
for
her
to
win
—
but
she
was
free
to
let
it
wait
,
she
did
not
want
to
think
of
it
,
she
was
thinking
of
the
first
touch
of
his
mouth
on
hers
—
she
was
free
to
feel
it
,
to
hold
a
moment
when
nothing
else
was
of
any
concern
—
she
smiled
defiantly
at
the
strips
of
sky
beyond
the
blinds
.
"
I
want
you
to
know
this
.
"
He
stood
by
the
bed
,
dressed
,
looking
down
at
her
.
His
voice
had
pronounced
it
evenly
,
with
great
clarity
and
no
inflection
.
She
looked
up
at
him
obediently
.
He
said
:
"
What
I
feel
for
you
is
contempt
.
But
it
’
s
nothing
,
compared
to
the
contempt
I
feel
for
myself
.
I
don
’
t
love
you
.
I
’
ve
never
loved
anyone
.
I
wanted
you
from
the
first
moment
I
saw
you
.
I
wanted
you
as
one
wants
a
whore
—
for
the
same
reason
and
purpose
.
I
spent
two
years
damning
myself
,
because
I
thought
you
were
above
a
desire
of
this
kind
.
You
’
re
not
.
You
’
re
as
vile
an
animal
as
I
am
.
I
should
loathe
my
discovering
it
.
I
don
’
t
.
Yesterday
,
I
would
have
killed
anyone
who
’
d
tell
me
that
you
were
capable
of
doing
what
I
’
ve
had
you
do
.
Today
,
I
would
give
my
life
not
to
let
it
be
otherwise
,
not
to
have
you
be
anything
but
the
bitch
you
are
.
All
the
greatness
that
I
saw
in
you
—
I
would
not
take
it
in
exchange
for
the
obscenity
of
your
talent
at
an
animal
’
s
sensation
of
pleasure
.
We
were
two
great
beings
,
you
and
I
,
proud
of
our
strength
,
weren
’
t
we
?
Well
,
this
is
all
that
’
s
left
of
us
—
and
I
want
no
self
-
deception
about
it
.
"
