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“
It
’
s
all
right
,
”
Jolene
said
,
a
bit
fast
.
And
then
,
“
No
,
it
isn
’
t
.
It
’
s
a
shuck
is
what
it
is
.
I
don
’
t
want
to
be
a
gym
coach
.
”
“
You
could
do
something
else
.
”
Jolene
shook
her
head
.
“
It
wasn
’
t
till
I
got
my
bachelor
’
s
last
year
that
I
really
caught
on
.
”
She
had
been
talking
with
her
mouth
full
.
Now
she
swallowed
and
leaned
forward
with
her
elbows
on
the
table
.
“
I
should
have
been
in
law
or
government
.
These
are
the
right
days
for
what
I
’
ve
got
,
and
I
blew
it
on
learning
the
side
straddle
hop
and
the
major
muscles
of
the
abdomen
.
”
Her
voice
got
lower
and
stronger
.
“
I
’
m
a
black
woman
.
I
’
m
an
orphan
.
I
ought
to
be
at
Harvard
.
I
ought
to
be
getting
my
picture
in
Time
magazine
like
you
.
”
“
You
’
d
look
great
with
Barbara
Walters
,
”
Beth
said
.
“
You
could
talk
about
the
emotional
deprivation
of
orphans
.
”
“
Could
I
ever
,
”
Jolene
said
.
“
I
’
d
like
to
tell
about
Helen
Deardorff
and
her
goddamn
tranquilizers
.
”
Beth
hesitated
a
moment
.
Then
she
said
,
“
Do
you
still
take
tranquilizers
?
”
“
No
,
”
Jolene
said
.
“
Hell
,
no
.
”
She
laughed
.
“
Never
forget
you
ripping
off
that
whole
jarful
.
Right
there
in
the
Multi
-
Purpose
Room
in
front
of
the
whole
fucking
orphanage
,
with
Old
Helen
ready
to
turn
into
a
pillar
of
salt
and
the
rest
of
us
with
our
jaws
hanging
slack
.
”
She
laughed
again
.
“
Made
you
a
hero
,
it
did
.
I
told
the
new
ones
about
it
after
you
was
gone
.
”
Jolene
had
finished
her
meal
;
she
sat
back
from
the
table
now
and
pushed
the
plate
toward
the
center
.
Then
she
leaned
back
,
took
a
package
of
Kents
from
her
jacket
pocket
and
looked
at
it
for
a
moment
.
“
When
your
picture
came
out
in
Life
,
I
was
the
one
put
it
on
the
bulletin
board
in
the
library
.
Still
there
as
far
as
I
know
.
”
She
lit
a
cigarette
,
using
a
little
black
lighter
,
and
inhaled
deeply
.
“
‘
A
Girl
Mozart
Startles
the
World
of
Chess
.
’
My
,
my
.
”
“
I
still
take
tranquilizers
,
”
Beth
said
.
“
Too
many
of
them
.
”
“
Oh
,
you
poor
thing
,
”
Jolene
said
wryly
,
looking
at
her
cigarette
.
