Reedle Откройте в мобильном приложении
Понятно
Понятно
Для того чтобы воспользоваться закладками, необходимо
Войти или зарегистрироваться
Отмена
Для того чтобы воспользоваться озвучкой предложений, необходимо
Войти или зарегистрироваться
Отмена
Озвучка предложений доступна при наличии PRO-доступа
Купить PRO-доступ
Отмена
441
During
the
journey
back
to
England
I
thought
much
of
Strickland
.
I
tried
to
set
in
order
what
I
had
to
tell
his
wife
.
It
was
unsatisfactory
,
and
I
could
not
imagine
that
she
would
be
content
with
me
;
I
was
not
content
with
myself
.
Strickland
perplexed
me
.
I
could
not
understand
his
motives
.
When
I
had
asked
him
what
first
gave
him
the
idea
of
being
a
painter
,
he
was
unable
or
unwilling
to
tell
me
.
I
could
make
nothing
of
it
.
I
tried
to
persuade
myself
than
an
obscure
feeling
of
revolt
had
been
gradually
coming
to
a
head
in
his
slow
mind
,
but
to
challenge
this
was
the
undoubted
fact
that
he
had
never
shown
any
impatience
with
the
monotony
of
his
life
.
If
,
seized
by
an
intolerable
boredom
,
he
had
determined
to
be
a
painter
merely
to
break
with
irksome
ties
,
it
would
have
been
comprehensible
,
and
commonplace
;
but
commonplace
is
precisely
what
I
felt
he
was
not
.
At
last
,
because
I
was
romantic
,
I
devised
an
explanation
which
I
acknowledged
to
be
far
-
fetched
,
but
which
was
the
only
one
that
in
any
way
satisfied
me
.
It
was
this
:
I
asked
myself
whether
there
was
not
in
his
soul
some
deep
-
rooted
instinct
of
creation
,
which
the
circumstances
of
his
life
had
obscured
,
but
which
grew
relentlessly
,
as
a
cancer
may
grow
in
the
living
tissues
,
till
at
last
it
took
possession
of
his
whole
being
and
forced
him
irresistibly
to
action
.
The
cuckoo
lays
its
egg
in
the
strange
bird
s
nest
,
and
when
the
young
one
is
hatched
it
shoulders
its
foster
-
brothers
out
and
breaks
at
last
the
nest
that
has
sheltered
it
.
442
But
how
strange
it
was
that
the
creative
instinct
should
seize
upon
this
dull
stockbroker
,
to
his
own
ruin
,
perhaps
,
and
to
the
misfortune
of
such
as
were
dependent
on
him
;
and
yet
no
stranger
than
the
way
in
which
the
spirit
of
God
has
seized
men
,
powerful
and
rich
,
pursuing
them
with
stubborn
vigilance
till
at
last
,
conquered
,
they
have
abandoned
the
joy
of
the
world
and
the
love
of
women
for
the
painful
austerities
of
the
cloister
.
Conversion
may
come
under
many
shapes
,
and
it
may
be
brought
about
in
many
ways
.
With
some
men
it
needs
a
cataclysm
,
as
a
stone
may
be
broken
to
fragments
by
the
fury
of
a
torrent
;
but
with
some
it
comes
gradually
,
as
a
stone
may
be
worn
away
by
the
ceaseless
fall
of
a
drop
of
water
.
Strickland
had
the
directness
of
the
fanatic
and
the
ferocity
of
the
apostle
.
443
But
to
my
practical
mind
it
remained
to
be
seen
whether
the
passion
which
obsessed
him
would
be
justified
of
its
works
.
When
I
asked
him
what
his
brother
-
students
at
the
night
classes
he
had
attended
in
London
thought
of
his
painting
,
he
answered
with
a
grin
:
Отключить рекламу
444
"
They
thought
it
a
joke
.
"
445
"
Have
you
begun
to
go
to
a
studio
here
?
"
446
"
Yes
.
The
blighter
came
round
this
morning
the
master
,
you
know
;
when
he
saw
my
drawing
he
just
raised
his
eyebrows
and
walked
on
.
"
447
Strickland
chuckled
.
He
did
not
seem
discouraged
.
He
was
independent
of
the
opinion
of
his
fellows
.
Отключить рекламу
448
And
it
was
just
that
which
had
most
disconcerted
me
in
my
dealings
with
him
.
When
people
say
they
do
not
care
what
others
think
of
them
,
for
the
most
part
they
deceive
themselves
.
449
Generally
they
mean
only
that
they
will
do
as
they
choose
,
in
the
confidence
that
no
one
will
know
their
vagaries
;
and
at
the
utmost
only
that
they
are
willing
to
act
contrary
to
the
opinion
of
the
majority
because
they
are
supported
by
the
approval
of
their
neighbours
.
It
is
not
difficult
to
be
unconventional
in
the
eyes
of
the
world
when
your
unconventionality
is
but
the
convention
of
your
set
.
It
affords
you
then
an
inordinate
amount
of
self
-
esteem
.
You
have
the
self
-
satisfaction
of
courage
without
the
inconvenience
of
danger
.
But
the
desire
for
approbation
is
perhaps
the
most
deeply
seated
instinct
of
civilised
man
.
No
one
runs
so
hurriedly
to
the
cover
of
respectability
as
the
unconventional
woman
who
has
exposed
herself
to
the
slings
and
arrows
of
outraged
propriety
.
I
do
not
believe
the
people
who
tell
me
they
do
not
care
a
row
of
pins
for
the
opinion
of
their
fellows
.
It
is
the
bravado
of
ignorance
.
They
mean
only
that
they
do
not
fear
reproaches
for
peccadillos
which
they
are
convinced
none
will
discover
.
450
But
here
was
a
man
who
sincerely
did
not
mind
what
people
thought
of
him
,
and
so
convention
had
no
hold
on
him
;
he
was
like
a
wrestler
whose
body
is
oiled
;
you
could
not
get
a
grip
on
him
;
it
gave
him
a
freedom
which
was
an
outrage
.
I
remember
saying
to
him
: