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"
Nine
dollars
a
month
,
"
said
Colon
.
"
I
saw
the
pay
scales
once
.
Nine
dollars
a
month
and
two
dollars
plumes
allowance
.
Only
he
never
claimed
that
bit
.
Funny
,
really
.
"
"
He
wasn
’
t
the
plumes
type
,
"
said
Nobby
.
"
You
’
re
right
,
"
said
Colon
.
"
The
thing
about
the
captain
,
see
,
I
read
this
book
once
.
.
.
you
know
we
’
ve
all
got
alcohol
in
our
bodies
.
.
.
sort
of
natural
alcohol
?
Even
if
you
never
touch
a
drop
in
your
life
,
your
body
sort
of
makes
it
anyway
.
.
.
but
Captain
Vimes
,
see
,
he
’
s
one
of
those
people
whose
body
doesn
’
t
do
it
naturally
.
Like
,
he
was
born
two
drinks
below
normal
.
"
"
Gosh
,
"
said
Carrot
.
"
Yes
.
.
.
so
,
when
he
’
s
sober
,
he
’
s
really
sober
.
Knurd
,
they
call
it
.
You
know
how
you
feel
when
you
wake
up
if
you
’
ve
been
on
the
piss
all
night
,
Nobby
?
Well
,
he
feels
like
that
all
the
time
.
"
"
Poor
bugger
,
"
said
Nobby
.
"
I
never
realised
.
No
wonder
he
’
s
always
so
gloomy
.
"
"
So
he
’
s
always
trying
to
catch
up
,
see
.
It
’
s
just
that
he
doesn
’
t
always
get
the
dose
right
.
And
,
of
course
-
"
Colon
glanced
at
Carrot
-
"
he
was
brung
low
by
a
woman
.
Mind
you
,
just
about
anything
brings
him
low
.
"
"
So
what
do
we
do
now
,
Sergeant
?
"
said
Nobby
.
"
And
do
you
think
he
’
d
mind
if
we
eat
his
cake
?
"
said
Carrot
wistfully
.
"
It
’
d
be
a
shame
to
let
it
go
stale
.
"
Colon
shrugged
.
