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- Теодор Драйзер
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- Стр. 59/524
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Now
it
was
all
so
tangled
,
so
hopeless
—
much
worse
than
it
was
before
,
because
she
had
the
semblance
of
aid
in
her
hand
which
she
could
not
use
.
Her
spirits
sank
so
that
at
supper
Minnie
felt
that
she
must
have
had
another
hard
day
.
Carrie
finally
decided
that
she
would
give
the
money
back
.
It
was
wrong
to
take
it
.
She
would
go
down
in
the
morning
and
hunt
for
work
.
At
noon
she
would
meet
Drouet
as
agreed
and
tell
him
.
At
this
decision
her
heart
sank
,
until
she
was
the
old
Carrie
of
distress
.
Curiously
,
she
could
not
hold
the
money
in
her
hand
without
feeling
some
relief
.
Even
after
all
her
depressing
conclusions
,
she
could
sweep
away
all
thought
about
the
matter
and
then
the
twenty
dollars
seemed
a
wonderful
and
delightful
thing
.
Ah
,
money
,
money
,
money
!
What
a
thing
it
was
to
have
.
How
plenty
of
it
would
clear
away
all
these
troubles
.
In
the
morning
she
got
up
and
started
out
a
little
early
.
Her
decision
to
hunt
for
work
was
moderately
strong
,
but
the
money
in
her
pocket
,
after
all
her
troubling
over
it
,
made
the
work
question
the
least
shade
less
terrible
.
She
walked
into
the
wholesale
district
,
but
as
the
thought
of
applying
came
with
each
passing
concern
,
her
heart
shrank
.
What
a
coward
she
was
,
she
thought
to
herself
.
Yet
she
had
applied
so
often
.
It
would
be
the
same
old
story
.
She
walked
on
and
on
,
and
finally
did
go
into
one
place
,
with
the
old
result
.
She
came
out
feeling
that
luck
was
against
her
.
It
was
no
use
.
Without
much
thinking
,
she
reached
Dearborn
Street
.
Here
was
the
great
Fair
store
with
its
multitude
of
delivery
wagons
about
its
long
window
display
,
its
crowd
of
shoppers
.
It
readily
changed
her
thoughts
,
she
who
was
so
weary
of
them
.
It
was
here
that
she
had
intended
to
come
and
get
her
new
things
.
Now
for
relief
from
distress
;
she
thought
she
would
go
in
and
see
.
She
would
look
at
the
jackets
.
There
is
nothing
in
this
world
more
delightful
than
that
middle
state
in
which
we
mentally
balance
at
times
,
possessed
of
the
means
,
lured
by
desire
,
and
yet
deterred
by
conscience
or
want
of
decision
.
When
Carrie
began
wandering
around
the
store
amid
the
fine
displays
she
was
in
this
mood
.
Her
original
experience
in
this
same
place
had
given
her
a
high
opinion
of
its
merits
.
Now
she
paused
at
each
individual
bit
of
finery
,
where
before
she
had
hurried
on
.
Her
woman
’
s
heart
was
warm
with
desire
for
them
.
How
would
she
look
in
this
,
how
charming
that
would
make
her
!
She
came
upon
the
corset
counter
and
paused
in
rich
reverie
as
she
noted
the
dainty
concoctions
of
colour
and
lace
there
displayed
.
If
she
would
only
make
up
her
mind
,
she
could
have
one
of
those
now
.
She
lingered
in
the
jewelry
department
.
She
saw
the
earrings
,
the
bracelets
,
the
pins
,
the
chains
.
What
would
she
not
have
given
if
she
could
have
had
them
all
!
She
would
look
fine
too
,
if
only
she
had
some
of
these
things
.
The
jackets
were
the
greatest
attraction
.
When
she
entered
the
store
,
she
already
had
her
heart
fixed
upon
the
peculiar
little
tan
jacket
with
large
mother
-
of
-
pearl
buttons
which
was
all
the
rage
that
fall
.
Still
she
delighted
to
convince
herself
that
there
was
nothing
she
would
like
better
.
She
went
about
among
the
glass
cases
and
racks
where
these
things
were
displayed
,
and
satisfied
herself
that
the
one
she
thought
of
was
the
proper
one
.
All
the
time
she
wavered
in
mind
,
now
persuading
herself
that
she
could
buy
it
right
away
if
she
chose
,
now
recalling
to
herself
the
actual
condition
.
At
last
the
noon
hour
was
dangerously
near
,
and
she
had
done
nothing
.
She
must
go
now
and
return
the
money
.
Drouet
was
on
the
corner
when
she
came
up
.
