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- Теодор Драйзер
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For
the
first
time
in
his
life
now
,
he
found
himself
confronted
by
a
choice
as
to
his
desire
for
the
more
accurate
knowledge
of
the
one
great
fascinating
mystery
that
had
for
so
long
confronted
and
fascinated
and
baffled
and
yet
frightened
him
a
little
.
For
,
despite
all
his
many
thoughts
in
regard
to
all
this
and
women
in
general
,
he
had
never
been
in
contact
with
any
one
of
them
in
this
way
.
And
now
--
now
--
All
of
a
sudden
he
felt
faint
thrills
of
hot
and
cold
racing
up
and
down
his
back
and
all
over
him
.
His
hands
and
face
grew
hot
and
then
became
moist
--
then
his
cheeks
and
forehead
flamed
.
He
could
feel
them
.
Strange
,
swift
,
enticing
and
yet
disturbing
thoughts
raced
in
and
out
of
his
consciousness
.
His
hair
tingled
and
he
saw
pictures
--
bacchanalian
scenes
--
which
swiftly
,
and
yet
in
vain
,
he
sought
to
put
out
of
his
mind
.
They
would
keep
coming
back
.
And
he
wanted
them
to
come
back
.
Yet
he
did
not
.
And
through
it
all
he
was
now
a
little
afraid
.
Pshaw
!
Had
he
no
courage
at
all
?
These
other
fellows
were
not
disturbed
by
the
prospects
of
what
was
before
them
.
They
were
very
gay
.
They
were
already
beginning
to
laugh
and
kid
one
another
in
regard
to
certain
funny
things
that
had
happened
the
last
time
they
were
all
out
together
.
But
what
would
his
mother
think
if
she
knew
?
His
mother
!
He
dared
not
think
of
his
mother
or
his
father
either
at
this
time
,
and
put
them
both
resolutely
out
of
his
mind
.
"
Oh
,
say
,
Kinsella
,
"
called
Higby
.
"
Do
you
remember
that
little
red
head
in
that
Pacific
Street
joint
that
wanted
you
to
run
away
to
Chicago
with
her
?
"
"
Do
I
?
"
replied
the
amused
Kinsella
,
taking
up
the
Martini
that
was
just
then
served
him
.
"
She
even
wanted
me
to
quit
the
hotel
game
and
let
her
start
me
in
a
business
of
some
kind
.
'
I
would
n't
need
to
work
at
all
if
I
stuck
by
her
,
'
she
told
me
.
"
"
Oh
,
no
,
you
would
n't
need
to
work
at
all
,
except
one
way
,
"
called
Ratterer
.
The
waiter
put
down
Clyde
's
glass
of
Rhine
wine
and
seltzer
beside
him
and
,
interested
and
intense
and
troubled
and
fascinated
by
all
that
he
heard
,
he
picked
it
up
,
tasted
it
and
,
finding
it
mild
and
rather
pleasing
,
drank
it
all
down
at
once
.
And
yet
so
wrought
up
were
his
thoughts
that
he
scarcely
realized
then
that
he
had
drunk
it
.
"
Good
for
you
,
"
observed
Kinsella
,
in
a
most
cordial
tone
.
"
You
must
like
that
stuff
.
"
"
Oh
,
it
's
not
so
bad
,
"
said
Clyde
.
And
Hegglund
,
seeing
how
swiftly
it
had
gone
,
and
feeling
that
Clyde
,
new
to
this
world
and
green
,
needed
to
be
cheered
and
strengthened
,
called
to
the
waiter
:
"
Here
Jerry
!
One
more
of
these
,
and
make
it
a
big
one
,
"
he
whispered
behind
his
hand
.
