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- Теодор Драйзер
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- Американская трагедия
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- Стр. 191/598
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On
the
instant
she
was
on
her
feet
and
had
turned
on
the
one
incandescent
globe
which
dangled
from
the
center
of
the
room
.
She
went
to
the
mirror
hanging
above
the
old
walnut
dresser
in
the
corner
and
stared
at
herself
.
Already
she
imagined
she
could
see
dark
rings
under
her
eyes
.
She
felt
numb
and
cold
and
now
shook
her
head
in
a
helpless
and
distracted
way
.
He
could
n't
be
that
mean
.
He
could
n't
be
that
cruel
to
her
now
--
could
he
?
Oh
,
if
he
but
knew
how
difficult
--
how
impossible
was
the
thing
he
was
asking
of
her
!
Oh
,
if
the
day
would
only
come
so
that
she
could
see
his
face
again
!
Oh
,
if
it
were
only
another
night
so
that
she
could
take
his
hands
in
hers
--
his
arm
--
feel
his
arms
about
her
.
"
Clyde
,
Clyde
,
"
she
exclaimed
half
aloud
,
"
you
would
n't
do
that
to
me
,
would
you
--
you
could
n't
.
"
She
crossed
to
an
old
,
faded
and
somewhat
decrepit
overstuffed
chair
which
stood
in
the
center
of
the
room
beside
a
small
table
whereon
lay
some
nondescript
books
and
magazines
--
the
Saturday
Evening
Post
,
Munsey
's
,
the
Popular
Science
Monthly
,
Bebe
's
Garden
Seeds
,
and
to
escape
most
distracting
and
searing
thoughts
,
sat
down
,
her
chin
in
her
hands
,
her
elbows
planted
on
her
knees
.
But
the
painful
thoughts
continuing
and
a
sense
of
chill
overtaking
her
,
she
took
a
comforter
off
the
bed
and
folded
it
about
her
,
then
opened
the
seed
catalogue
--
only
to
throw
it
down
.
"
No
,
no
,
no
,
he
could
n't
do
that
to
me
,
he
would
n't
.
"
She
must
not
let
him
.
Why
,
he
had
told
her
over
and
over
that
he
was
crazy
about
her
--
madly
in
love
with
her
.
They
had
been
to
all
these
wonderful
places
together
.
And
now
,
without
any
real
consciousness
of
her
movements
,
she
was
moving
from
the
chair
to
the
edge
of
the
bed
,
sitting
with
elbows
on
knees
and
chin
in
hands
;
or
she
was
before
the
mirror
or
peering
restlessly
out
into
the
dark
to
see
if
there
were
any
trace
of
day
.
And
at
six
,
and
six-thirty
when
the
light
was
just
breaking
and
it
was
nearing
time
to
dress
,
she
was
still
up
--
in
the
chair
,
on
the
edge
of
the
bed
,
in
the
corner
before
the
mirror
.
But
she
had
reached
but
one
definite
conclusion
and
that
was
that
in
some
way
she
must
arrange
not
to
have
Clyde
leave
her
.
That
must
not
be
.
There
must
be
something
that
she
could
say
or
do
that
would
cause
him
to
love
her
still
--
even
if
,
even
if
--
well
,
even
if
she
must
let
him
stop
in
here
or
somewhere
from
time
to
time
--
some
other
room
in
some
other
rooming
house
maybe
,
where
she
could
arrange
in
some
way
beforehand
--
say
that
he
was
her
brother
or
something
.
But
the
mood
that
dominated
Clyde
was
of
a
different
nature
.
To
have
understood
it
correctly
,
the
full
measure
and
obstinacy
and
sullen
contentiousness
that
had
suddenly
generated
,
one
would
have
had
to
return
to
Kansas
City
and
the
period
in
which
he
had
been
so
futilely
dancing
attendance
upon
Hortense
Briggs
.
Also
his
having
been
compelled
to
give
up
Rita
--
yet
to
no
end
.
For
,
although
the
present
conditions
and
situation
were
different
,
and
he
had
no
moral
authority
wherewith
to
charge
Roberta
with
any
such
unfair
treatment
as
Hortense
had
meted
out
to
him
,
still
there
was
this
other
fact
that
girls
--
all
of
them
--
were
obviously
stubborn
and
self-preservative
,
always
setting
themselves
apart
from
and
even
above
the
average
man
and
so
wishing
to
compel
him
to
do
a
lot
of
things
for
them
without
their
wishing
to
do
anything
in
return
.
And
had
not
Ratterer
always
told
him
that
in
so
far
as
girls
were
concerned
he
was
more
or
less
of
a
fool
--
too
easy
--
too
eager
to
show
his
hand
and
let
them
know
that
he
was
struck
on
them
.
Whereas
,
as
Ratterer
had
explained
,
Clyde
possessed
the
looks
--
the
"
goods
"
--
and
why
should
he
always
be
trailing
after
girls
unless
they
wanted
him
very
much
.
And
this
thought
and
compliment
had
impressed
him
very
much
at
that
time
.
Only
because
of
the
fiascos
in
connection
with
Hortense
and
Rita
he
was
more
earnest
now
.
Yet
here
he
was
again
in
danger
of
repeating
or
bringing
upon
himself
what
had
befallen
him
in
the
case
of
Hortense
and
Rita
.
At
the
same
time
he
was
not
without
the
self-incriminating
thought
that
in
seeking
this
,
most
distinctly
he
was
driving
toward
a
relationship
which
was
not
legitimate
and
that
would
prove
dangerous
in
the
future
.
