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- Теодор Драйзер
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- Стр. 14/598
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And
all
this
as
a
revealing
flash
after
all
the
years
of
walking
through
the
streets
with
his
father
and
mother
to
public
prayer
meeting
,
the
sitting
in
chapel
and
listening
to
queer
and
nondescript
individuals
--
depressing
and
disconcerting
people
--
telling
how
Christ
had
saved
them
and
what
God
had
done
for
them
.
You
bet
he
would
get
out
of
that
now
.
He
would
work
and
save
his
money
and
be
somebody
.
Decidedly
this
simple
and
yet
idyllic
compound
of
the
commonplace
had
all
the
luster
and
wonder
of
a
spiritual
transfiguration
,
the
true
mirage
of
the
lost
and
thirsting
and
seeking
victim
of
the
desert
.
However
,
the
trouble
with
this
particular
position
,
as
time
speedily
proved
,
was
that
much
as
it
might
teach
him
of
mixing
drinks
and
how
to
eventually
earn
twelve
dollars
a
week
,
it
was
no
immediate
solvent
for
the
yearnings
and
ambitions
that
were
already
gnawing
at
his
vitals
.
For
Albert
Sieberling
,
his
immediate
superior
,
was
determined
to
keep
as
much
of
his
knowledge
,
as
well
as
the
most
pleasant
parts
of
the
tasks
,
to
himself
.
And
further
he
was
quite
at
one
with
the
druggist
for
whom
they
worked
in
thinking
that
Clyde
,
in
addition
to
assisting
him
about
the
fountain
,
should
run
such
errands
as
the
druggist
desired
,
which
kept
Clyde
industriously
employed
for
nearly
all
the
hours
he
was
on
duty
.
Consequently
there
was
no
immediate
result
to
all
this
.
Clyde
could
see
no
way
to
dressing
better
than
he
did
.
Worse
,
he
was
haunted
by
the
fact
that
he
had
very
little
money
and
very
few
contacts
and
connections
--
so
few
that
,
outside
his
own
home
,
he
was
lonely
and
not
so
very
much
less
than
lonely
there
.
The
flight
of
Esta
had
thrown
a
chill
over
the
religious
work
there
,
and
because
,
as
yet
,
she
had
not
returned
--
the
family
,
as
he
now
heard
,
was
thinking
of
breaking
up
here
and
moving
,
for
want
of
a
better
idea
,
to
Denver
,
Colorado
.
But
Clyde
,
by
now
,
was
convinced
that
he
did
not
wish
to
accompany
them
.
What
was
the
good
of
it
,
he
asked
himself
?
There
would
be
just
another
mission
there
,
the
same
as
this
one
.
He
had
always
lived
at
home
--
in
the
rooms
at
the
rear
of
the
mission
in
Bickel
Street
,
but
he
hated
it
.
And
since
his
eleventh
year
,
during
all
of
which
time
his
family
had
been
residing
in
Kansas
City
,
he
had
been
ashamed
to
bring
boy
friends
to
or
near
it
.
For
that
reason
he
had
always
avoided
boy
friends
,
and
had
walked
and
played
very
much
alone
--
or
with
his
brother
and
sisters
.
But
now
that
he
was
sixteen
and
old
enough
to
make
his
own
way
,
he
ought
to
be
getting
out
of
this
.
And
yet
he
was
earning
almost
nothing
--
not
enough
to
live
on
,
if
he
were
alone
--
and
he
had
not
as
yet
developed
sufficient
skill
or
courage
to
get
anything
better
.
Nevertheless
when
his
parents
began
to
talk
of
moving
to
Denver
,
and
suggested
that
he
might
secure
work
out
there
,
never
assuming
for
a
moment
that
he
would
not
want
to
go
he
began
to
throw
out
hints
to
the
effect
that
it
might
he
better
if
he
did
not
.
He
liked
Kansas
City
.
What
was
the
use
of
changing
?
He
had
a
job
now
and
he
might
get
something
better
.
But
his
parents
,
bethinking
themselves
of
Esta
and
the
fate
that
had
overtaken
her
,
were
not
a
little
dubious
as
to
the
outcome
of
such
early
adventuring
on
his
part
alone
.
Once
they
were
away
,
where
would
he
live
?
With
whom
?
What
sort
of
influence
would
enter
his
life
,
who
would
be
at
hand
to
aid
and
council
and
guide
him
in
the
straight
and
narrow
path
,
as
they
had
done
?
It
was
something
to
think
about
.
But
spurred
by
this
imminence
of
Denver
,
which
now
daily
seemed
to
be
drawing
nearer
,
and
the
fact
that
not
long
after
this
Mr.
Sieberling
,
owing
to
his
too
obvious
gallantries
in
connection
with
the
fair
sex
,
lost
his
place
in
the
drug
store
,
and
Clyde
came
by
a
new
and
bony
and
chill
superior
who
did
not
seem
to
want
him
as
an
assistant
,
he
decided
to
quit
--
not
at
once
,
but
rather
to
see
,
on
such
errands
as
took
him
out
of
the
store
,
if
he
could
not
find
something
else
.
Incidentally
in
so
doing
,
looking
here
and
there
,
he
one
day
thought
he
would
speak
to
the
manager
of
the
fountain
which
was
connected
with
the
leading
drug
store
in
the
principal
hotel
of
the
city
--
the
latter
a
great
twelve-story
affair
,
which
represented
,
as
he
saw
it
,
the
quintessence
of
luxury
and
ease
.
Its
windows
were
always
so
heavily
curtained
;
the
main
entrance
(
he
had
never
ventured
to
look
beyond
that
)
was
a
splendiferous
combination
of
a
glass
and
iron
awning
,
coupled
with
a
marble
corridor
lined
with
palms
.
Often
he
had
passed
here
,
wondering
with
boyish
curiosity
what
the
nature
of
the
life
of
such
a
place
might
be
.
Before
its
doors
,
so
many
taxis
and
automobiles
were
always
in
waiting
.
