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Louis
did
not
respond
.
The
eye
of
God
was
on
the
sparrow
;
so
said
good
King
James
.
Louis
,
however
,
was
a
lesser
being
,
and
his
eye
was
on
those
muddy
footprints
.
"
Louis
,
Gage
is
dead
,
"
Goldman
was
saying
.
"
I
know
that
must
be
hard
to
accept
--
for
you
and
Rachel
both
--
but
your
daughter
is
very
much
alive
,
and
she
needs
you
.
"
Yes
,
I
accept
that
.
You
may
be
a
stupid
old
fart
,
Irwin
,
but
perhaps
the
nightmare
that
passed
between
your
two
daughters
on
that
April
day
in
1965
taught
you
something
about
sensitivity
.
She
needs
me
,
but
I
ca
n't
come
,
because
I
'm
afraid
--
so
terribly
afraid
--
that
my
hands
are
filthy
with
her
mother
's
blood
.
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Louis
regarded
those
hands
.
Louis
regarded
the
dirt
under
his
nails
,
which
was
so
like
the
dirt
which
comprised
those
footprints
on
the
kitchen
floor
.
"
All
right
,
"
he
said
,
"
I
understand
.
We
'll
be
there
as
soon
as
we
can
,
Irwin
.
By
tonight
,
if
that
's
possible
.
Thank
you
.
"
"
We
did
the
best
we
could
,
"
Goldman
said
.
"
Maybe
we
're
too
old
.
Maybe
,
Louis
,
maybe
we
always
were
.
"
"
Did
she
say
anything
else
?
"
Louis
asked
.
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Goldman
's
reply
was
like
the
toll
of
a
funeral
bell
against
the
wall
of
his
heart
.
"
A
lot
,
but
only
one
other
thing
I
could
make
out
:
"
Paxcow
says
it
's
too
late
.
"
He
hung
up
the
telephone
and
moved
back
toward
the
stove
in
a
daze
,
apparently
meaning
to
continue
on
with
breakfast
or
put
the
things
away
,
he
did
n't
know
which
,
and
about
halfway
across
the
kitchen
a
wave
of
faintness
poured
over
him
,
floating
gray
overcame
his
sight
,
and
he
swooned
to
the
floor
--
"
swoon
"
was
the
right
word
because
it
seemed
to
take
forever
.
He
fell
down
through
cloudy
depths
;
it
seemed
to
him
that
he
turned
over
and
over
,
looped
the
loop
,
did
a
dipsy
doodle
or
two
,
slipped
an
Immelmann
.
Then
he
struck
on
his
bad
knee
and
the
chromium
bolt
of
pain
through
his
head
brought
him
back
with
a
scream
of
agony
.
For
a
moment
he
could
only
crouch
,
the
tears
starting
from
his
eyes
.
At
last
he
made
it
back
to
his
feet
and
stood
there
,
swaying
.
But
his
head
was
clear
again
.
That
was
something
.
Was
n't
it
?