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"
So
I
am
completely
unworthy
of
you
,
"
she
said
to
him
,
taking
his
hand
.
Julien
kissed
her
,
but
at
the
same
time
the
iron
hand
of
duty
gripped
his
heart
.
If
she
sees
how
much
I
adore
her
I
shall
lose
her
.
And
before
leaving
her
arms
,
he
had
reassumed
all
that
dignity
which
is
proper
to
a
man
.
He
managed
on
this
and
the
following
days
to
conceal
his
inordinate
happiness
.
There
were
moments
when
he
even
refused
himself
the
pleasure
of
clasping
her
in
his
arms
.
At
other
times
the
delirium
of
happiness
prevailed
over
all
the
counsels
of
prudence
.
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He
had
been
accustomed
to
station
himself
near
a
bower
of
honeysuckle
in
the
garden
arranged
in
such
a
way
so
as
to
conceal
the
ladder
when
he
had
looked
up
at
Mathilde
s
blind
in
the
distance
,
and
lamented
her
inconstancy
.
A
very
big
oak
tree
was
quite
near
,
and
the
trunk
of
that
tree
prevented
him
from
being
seen
by
the
indiscreet
.
As
he
passed
with
Mathilde
over
this
very
place
which
recalled
his
excessive
unhappiness
so
vividly
,
the
contrast
between
his
former
despair
and
his
present
happiness
proved
too
much
for
his
character
.
Tears
inundated
his
eyes
,
and
he
carried
his
sweetheart
s
hand
to
his
lips
:
"
It
was
here
I
used
to
live
in
my
thoughts
of
you
,
it
was
from
here
that
I
used
to
look
at
that
blind
,
and
waited
whole
hours
for
the
happy
moment
when
I
would
see
that
hand
open
it
.
"
His
weakness
was
unreserved
.
He
portrayed
the
extremity
of
his
former
despair
in
genuine
colours
which
could
not
possibly
have
been
invented
.
Short
interjections
testified
to
that
present
happiness
which
had
put
an
end
to
that
awful
agony
.
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"
My
God
,
what
am
I
doing
?
"
thought
Julien
,
suddenly
recovering
himself
.
"
I
am
ruining
myself
.
"
In
his
excessive
alarm
he
thought
that
he
already
detected
a
diminution
of
the
love
in
mademoiselle
de
la
Mole
s
eyes
.
It
was
an
illusion
,
but
Julien
s
face
suddenly
changed
its
expression
and
became
overspread
by
a
mortal
pallor
.
His
eyes
lost
their
fire
,
and
an
expression
of
haughtiness
touched
with
malice
soon
succeeded
to
his
look
of
the
most
genuine
and
unreserved
love
.
"
But
what
is
the
matter
with
you
,
my
dear
,
"
said
Mathilde
to
him
,
both
tenderly
and
anxiously
.