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"
Yes
.
"
"
But
you
just
said
-
"
"
That
I
wasn
’
t
mad
at
you
.
Can
’
t
you
see
that
,
Bella
?
"
He
was
suddenly
intense
,
all
trace
of
teasing
gone
.
"
Don
’
t
you
understand
?
"
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"
See
what
?
"
I
demanded
,
confused
by
his
sudden
mood
swing
as
much
as
his
words
.
"
I
’
m
never
angry
with
you
-
how
could
I
be
?
Brave
,
trusting
.
.
.
warm
as
you
are
.
"
"
Then
why
?
"
I
whispered
,
remembering
the
black
moods
that
pulled
him
away
from
me
,
that
I
’
d
always
interpreted
as
well
-
justified
frustration
-
frustration
at
my
weakness
,
my
slowness
,
my
unruly
human
reactions
.
.
.
He
put
his
hands
carefully
on
both
sides
of
my
face
.
"
I
infuriate
myself
,
"
he
said
gently
.
"
The
way
I
can
’
t
seem
to
keep
from
putting
you
in
danger
.
My
very
existence
puts
you
at
risk
.
Sometimes
I
truly
hate
myself
.
I
should
be
stronger
,
I
should
be
able
to
-
"
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I
placed
my
hand
over
his
mouth
.
"
Don
’
t
.
"
He
took
my
hand
,
moving
it
from
his
lips
,
but
holding
it
to
his
face
.
"
I
love
you
,
"
he
said
.
"
It
’
s
a
poor
excuse
for
what
I
’
m
doing
,
but
it
’
s
still
true
.
"