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I
shivered
in
the
warm
sun
,
seeing
my
memories
anew
through
his
eyes
,
only
now
grasping
the
danger
.
Poor
Ms
.
Cope
;
I
shivered
again
at
how
close
I
’
d
come
to
being
inadvertently
responsible
for
her
death
.
"
But
I
resisted
.
I
don
’
t
know
how
.
I
forced
myself
not
to
wait
for
you
,
not
to
follow
you
from
the
school
.
It
was
easier
outside
,
when
I
couldn
’
t
smell
you
anymore
,
to
think
clearly
,
to
make
the
right
decision
.
I
left
the
others
near
home
-
I
was
too
ashamed
to
tell
them
how
weak
I
was
,
they
only
knew
something
was
very
wrong
-
and
then
I
went
straight
to
Carlisle
,
at
the
hospital
,
to
tell
him
I
was
leaving
.
"
I
stared
in
surprise
.
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"
I
traded
cars
with
him
-
he
had
a
full
tank
of
gas
and
I
didn
’
t
want
to
stop
.
I
didn
’
t
dare
to
go
home
,
to
face
Esme
.
She
wouldn
’
t
have
let
me
go
without
a
scene
.
She
would
have
tried
to
convince
me
that
it
wasn
’
t
necessary
.
.
.
"
By
the
next
morning
I
was
in
Alaska
.
"
He
sounded
ashamed
,
as
if
admitting
a
great
cowardice
.
"
I
spent
two
days
there
,
with
some
old
acquaintances
.
.
.
but
I
was
homesick
.
I
hated
knowing
I
’
d
upset
Esme
,
and
the
rest
of
them
,
my
adopted
family
.
In
the
pure
air
of
the
mountains
it
was
hard
to
believe
you
were
so
irresistible
.
I
convinced
myself
it
was
weak
to
run
away
.
I
’
d
dealt
with
temptation
before
,
not
of
this
magnitude
,
not
even
close
,
but
I
was
strong
.
Who
were
you
,
an
insignificant
little
girl
"
-
he
grinned
suddenly
-
"
to
chase
me
from
the
place
I
wanted
to
be
?
So
I
came
back
.
.
.
"
He
stared
off
into
space
.
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I
couldn
’
t
speak
.
"
I
took
precautions
,
hunting
,
feeding
more
than
usual
before
seeing
you
again
.
I
was
sure
that
I
was
strong
enough
to
treat
you
like
any
other
human
.
I
was
arrogant
about
it
.
"
It
was
unquestionably
a
complication
that
I
couldn
’
t
simply
read
your
thoughts
to
know
what
your
reaction
was
to
me
.
I
wasn
’
t
used
to
having
to
go
to
such
circuitous
measures
,
listening
to
your
words
in
Jessica
’
s
mind
.
.
.
her
mind
isn
’
t
very
original
,
and
it
was
annoying
to
have
to
stoop
to
that
.
And
then
I
couldn
’
t
know
if
you
really
meant
what
you
said
.
It
was
all
extremely
irritating
.
"
He
frowned
at
the
memory
.