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Most
of
the
morning
was
spent
in
the
open
air
.
I
led
him
out
of
the
wet
and
wild
wood
into
some
cheerful
fields
:
I
described
to
him
how
brilliantly
green
they
were
;
how
the
flowers
and
hedges
looked
refreshed
;
how
sparklingly
blue
was
the
sky
.
I
sought
a
seat
for
him
in
a
hidden
and
lovely
spot
,
a
dry
stump
of
a
tree
;
nor
did
I
refuse
to
let
him
,
when
seated
,
place
me
on
his
knee
.
Why
should
I
,
when
both
he
and
I
were
happier
near
than
apart
?
Pilot
lay
beside
us
:
all
was
quiet
.
He
broke
out
suddenly
while
clasping
me
in
his
arms
--
"
Cruel
,
cruel
deserter
!
Oh
,
Jane
,
what
did
I
feel
when
I
discovered
you
had
fled
from
Thornfield
,
and
when
I
could
nowhere
find
you
;
and
,
after
examining
your
apartment
,
ascertained
that
you
had
taken
no
money
,
nor
anything
which
could
serve
as
an
equivalent
!
A
pearl
necklace
I
had
given
you
lay
untouched
in
its
little
casket
;
your
trunks
were
left
corded
and
locked
as
they
had
been
prepared
for
the
bridal
tour
.
What
could
my
darling
do
,
I
asked
,
left
destitute
and
penniless
?
And
what
did
she
do
?
Let
me
hear
now
.
"
Thus
urged
,
I
began
the
narrative
of
my
experience
for
the
last
year
.
I
softened
considerably
what
related
to
the
three
days
of
wandering
and
starvation
,
because
to
have
told
him
all
would
have
been
to
inflict
unnecessary
pain
:
the
little
I
did
say
lacerated
his
faithful
heart
deeper
than
I
wished
.
I
should
not
have
left
him
thus
,
he
said
,
without
any
means
of
making
my
way
:
I
should
have
told
him
my
intention
.
I
should
have
confided
in
him
:
he
would
never
have
forced
me
to
be
his
mistress
.
Violent
as
he
had
seemed
in
his
despair
,
he
,
in
truth
,
loved
me
far
too
well
and
too
tenderly
to
constitute
himself
my
tyrant
:
he
would
have
given
me
half
his
fortune
,
without
demanding
so
much
as
a
kiss
in
return
,
rather
than
I
should
have
flung
myself
friendless
on
the
wide
world
.
I
had
endured
,
he
was
certain
,
more
than
I
had
confessed
to
him
.
"
Well
,
whatever
my
sufferings
had
been
,
they
were
very
short
,
"
I
answered
:
and
then
I
proceeded
to
tell
him
how
I
had
been
received
at
Moor
House
;
how
I
had
obtained
the
office
of
schoolmistress
,
etc.
.
The
accession
of
fortune
,
the
discovery
of
my
relations
,
followed
in
due
order
.
Of
course
,
St.
John
Rivers
'
name
came
in
frequently
in
the
progress
of
my
tale
.
When
I
had
done
,
that
name
was
immediately
taken
up
.
"
This
St.
John
,
then
,
is
your
cousin
?
"
"
Yes
.
"
"
You
have
spoken
of
him
often
:
do
you
like
him
?
"
