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211
"
What
would
Uncle
Reed
say
to
you
,
if
he
were
alive
?
"
was
my
scarcely
voluntary
demand
.
I
say
scarcely
voluntary
,
for
it
seemed
as
if
my
tongue
pronounced
words
without
my
will
consenting
to
their
utterance
:
something
spoke
out
of
me
over
which
I
had
no
control
.
212
"
What
?
"
said
Mrs.
Reed
under
her
breath
:
her
usually
cold
composed
grey
eye
became
troubled
with
a
look
like
fear
;
she
took
her
hand
from
my
arm
,
and
gazed
at
me
as
if
she
really
did
not
know
whether
I
were
child
or
fiend
.
I
was
now
in
for
it
.
213
"
My
Uncle
Reed
is
in
heaven
,
and
can
see
all
you
do
and
think
;
and
so
can
papa
and
mama
:
they
know
how
you
shut
me
up
all
day
long
,
and
how
you
wish
me
dead
.
"
Отключить рекламу
214
Mrs.
Reed
soon
rallied
her
spirits
:
she
shook
me
most
soundly
,
she
boxed
both
my
ears
,
and
then
left
me
without
a
word
.
215
Bessie
supplied
the
hiatus
by
a
homily
of
an
hour
's
length
,
in
which
she
proved
beyond
a
doubt
that
I
was
the
most
wicked
and
abandoned
child
ever
reared
under
a
roof
.
I
half
believed
her
;
for
I
felt
indeed
only
bad
feelings
surging
in
my
breast
.
216
November
,
December
,
and
half
of
January
passed
away
.
Christmas
and
the
New
Year
had
been
celebrated
at
Gateshead
with
the
usual
festive
cheer
;
presents
had
been
interchanged
,
dinners
and
evening
parties
given
.
From
every
enjoyment
I
was
,
of
course
,
excluded
:
my
share
of
the
gaiety
consisted
in
witnessing
the
daily
apparelling
of
Eliza
and
Georgiana
,
and
seeing
them
descend
to
the
drawing-room
,
dressed
out
in
thin
muslin
frocks
and
scarlet
sashes
,
with
hair
elaborately
ringletted
;
and
afterwards
,
in
listening
to
the
sound
of
the
piano
or
the
harp
played
below
,
to
the
passing
to
and
fro
of
the
butler
and
footman
,
to
the
jingling
of
glass
and
china
as
refreshments
were
handed
,
to
the
broken
hum
of
conversation
as
the
drawing-room
door
opened
and
closed
.
When
tired
of
this
occupation
,
I
would
retire
from
the
stairhead
to
the
solitary
and
silent
nursery
:
there
,
though
somewhat
sad
,
I
was
not
miserable
.
To
speak
truth
,
I
had
not
the
least
wish
to
go
into
company
,
for
in
company
I
was
very
rarely
noticed
;
and
if
Bessie
had
but
been
kind
and
companionable
,
I
should
have
deemed
it
a
treat
to
spend
the
evenings
quietly
with
her
,
instead
of
passing
them
under
the
formidable
eye
of
Mrs.
Reed
,
in
a
room
full
of
ladies
and
gentlemen
.
But
Bessie
,
as
soon
as
she
had
dressed
her
young
ladies
,
used
to
take
herself
off
to
the
lively
regions
of
the
kitchen
and
housekeeper
's
room
,
generally
bearing
the
candle
along
with
her
.
I
then
sat
with
my
doll
on
my
knee
till
the
fire
got
low
,
glancing
round
occasionally
to
make
sure
that
nothing
worse
than
myself
haunted
the
shadowy
room
;
and
when
the
embers
sank
to
a
dull
red
,
I
undressed
hastily
,
tugging
at
knots
and
strings
as
I
best
might
,
and
sought
shelter
from
cold
and
darkness
in
my
crib
.
217
To
this
crib
I
always
took
my
doll
;
human
beings
must
love
something
,
and
,
in
the
dearth
of
worthier
objects
of
affection
,
I
contrived
to
find
a
pleasure
in
loving
and
cherishing
a
faded
graven
image
,
shabby
as
a
miniature
scarecrow
.
It
puzzles
me
now
to
remember
with
what
absurd
sincerity
I
doated
on
this
little
toy
,
half
fancying
it
alive
and
capable
of
sensation
.
I
could
not
sleep
unless
it
was
folded
in
my
night-gown
;
and
when
it
lay
there
safe
and
warm
,
I
was
comparatively
happy
,
believing
it
to
be
happy
likewise
.
Отключить рекламу
218
Long
did
the
hours
seem
while
I
waited
the
departure
of
the
company
,
and
listened
for
the
sound
of
Bessie
's
step
on
the
stairs
:
sometimes
she
would
come
up
in
the
interval
to
seek
her
thimble
or
her
scissors
,
or
perhaps
to
bring
me
something
by
way
of
supper
--
a
bun
or
a
cheese-cake
--
then
she
would
sit
on
the
bed
while
I
ate
it
,
and
when
I
had
finished
,
she
would
tuck
the
clothes
round
me
,
and
twice
she
kissed
me
,
and
said
,
"
Good
night
,
Miss
Jane
.
"
When
thus
gentle
,
Bessie
seemed
to
me
the
best
,
prettiest
,
kindest
being
in
the
world
;
and
I
wished
most
intensely
that
she
would
always
be
so
pleasant
and
amiable
,
and
never
push
me
about
,
or
scold
,
or
task
me
unreasonably
,
as
she
was
too
often
wont
to
do
.
Bessie
Lee
must
,
I
think
,
have
been
a
girl
of
good
natural
capacity
,
for
she
was
smart
in
all
she
did
,
and
had
a
remarkable
knack
of
narrative
;
so
,
at
least
,
I
judge
from
the
impression
made
on
me
by
her
nursery
tales
.
She
was
pretty
too
,
if
my
recollections
of
her
face
and
person
are
correct
.
I
remember
her
as
a
slim
young
woman
,
with
black
hair
,
dark
eyes
,
very
nice
features
,
and
good
,
clear
complexion
;
but
she
had
a
capricious
and
hasty
temper
,
and
indifferent
ideas
of
principle
or
justice
:
still
,
such
as
she
was
,
I
preferred
her
to
any
one
else
at
Gateshead
Hall
.
219
It
was
the
fifteenth
of
January
,
about
nine
o'clock
in
the
morning
:
Bessie
was
gone
down
to
breakfast
;
my
cousins
had
not
yet
been
summoned
to
their
mama
;
Eliza
was
putting
on
her
bonnet
and
warm
garden-coat
to
go
and
feed
her
poultry
,
an
occupation
of
which
she
was
fond
:
and
not
less
so
of
selling
the
eggs
to
the
housekeeper
and
hoarding
up
the
money
she
thus
obtained
.
She
had
a
turn
for
traffic
,
and
a
marked
propensity
for
saving
;
shown
not
only
in
the
vending
of
eggs
and
chickens
,
but
also
in
driving
hard
bargains
with
the
gardener
about
flower-roots
,
seeds
,
and
slips
of
plants
;
that
functionary
having
orders
from
Mrs.
Reed
to
buy
of
his
young
lady
all
the
products
of
her
parterre
she
wished
to
sell
:
and
Eliza
would
have
sold
the
hair
off
her
head
if
she
could
have
made
a
handsome
profit
thereby
.
As
to
her
money
,
she
first
secreted
it
in
odd
corners
,
wrapped
in
a
rag
or
an
old
curl-paper
;
but
some
of
these
hoards
having
been
discovered
by
the
housemaid
,
Eliza
,
fearful
of
one
day
losing
her
valued
treasure
,
consented
to
intrust
it
to
her
mother
,
at
a
usurious
rate
of
interest
--
fifty
or
sixty
per
cent
.
;
which
interest
she
exacted
every
quarter
,
keeping
her
accounts
in
a
little
book
with
anxious
accuracy
.
220
Georgiana
sat
on
a
high
stool
,
dressing
her
hair
at
the
glass
,
and
interweaving
her
curls
with
artificial
flowers
and
faded
feathers
,
of
which
she
had
found
a
store
in
a
drawer
in
the
attic
.
I
was
making
my
bed
,
having
received
strict
orders
from
Bessie
to
get
it
arranged
before
she
returned
.
Having
spread
the
quilt
and
folded
my
night-dress
,
I
went
to
the
window-seat
to
put
in
order
some
picture-books
and
doll
's
house
furniture
scattered
there
;
an
abrupt
command
from
Georgiana
to
let
her
playthings
alone
stopped
my
proceedings
;
and
then
,
for
lack
of
other
occupation
,
I
fell
to
breathing
on
the
frost-flowers
with
which
the
window
was
fretted
,
and
thus
clearing
a
space
in
the
glass
through
which
I
might
look
out
on
the
grounds
,
where
all
was
still
and
petrified
under
the
influence
of
a
hard
frost
.