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111
"
Something
passed
her
,
all
dressed
in
white
,
and
vanished
"
--
"
A
great
black
dog
behind
him
"
--
"
Three
loud
raps
on
the
chamber
door
"
--
"
A
light
in
the
churchyard
just
over
his
grave
,
"
112
At
last
both
slept
:
the
fire
and
the
candle
went
out
.
For
me
,
the
watches
of
that
long
night
passed
in
ghastly
wakefulness
;
strained
by
dread
:
such
dread
as
children
only
can
feel
.
113
No
severe
or
prolonged
bodily
illness
followed
this
incident
of
the
red-room
;
it
only
gave
my
nerves
a
shock
of
which
I
feel
the
reverberation
to
this
day
.
Yes
,
Mrs.
Reed
,
to
you
I
owe
some
fearful
pangs
of
mental
suffering
,
but
I
ought
to
forgive
you
,
for
you
knew
not
what
you
did
:
while
rending
my
heart-strings
,
you
thought
you
were
only
uprooting
my
bad
propensities
.
Отключить рекламу
114
Next
day
,
by
noon
,
I
was
up
and
dressed
,
and
sat
wrapped
in
a
shawl
by
the
nursery
hearth
.
I
felt
physically
weak
and
broken
down
:
but
my
worse
ailment
was
an
unutterable
wretchedness
of
mind
:
a
wretchedness
which
kept
drawing
from
me
silent
tears
;
no
sooner
had
I
wiped
one
salt
drop
from
my
cheek
than
another
followed
.
Yet
,
I
thought
,
I
ought
to
have
been
happy
,
for
none
of
the
Reeds
were
there
,
they
were
all
gone
out
in
the
carriage
with
their
mama
.
Abbot
,
too
,
was
sewing
in
another
room
,
and
Bessie
,
as
she
moved
hither
and
thither
,
putting
away
toys
and
arranging
drawers
,
addressed
to
me
every
now
and
then
a
word
of
unwonted
kindness
.
115
This
state
of
things
should
have
been
to
me
a
paradise
of
peace
,
accustomed
as
I
was
to
a
life
of
ceaseless
reprimand
and
thankless
fagging
;
but
,
in
fact
,
my
racked
nerves
were
now
in
such
a
state
that
no
calm
could
soothe
,
and
no
pleasure
excite
them
agreeably
.
116
Bessie
had
been
down
into
the
kitchen
,
and
she
brought
up
with
her
a
tart
on
a
certain
brightly
painted
china
plate
,
whose
bird
of
paradise
,
nestling
in
a
wreath
of
convolvuli
and
rosebuds
,
had
been
wont
to
stir
in
me
a
most
enthusiastic
sense
of
admiration
;
and
which
plate
I
had
often
petitioned
to
be
allowed
to
take
in
my
hand
in
order
to
examine
it
more
closely
,
but
had
always
hitherto
been
deemed
unworthy
of
such
a
privilege
.
This
precious
vessel
was
now
placed
on
my
knee
,
and
I
was
cordially
invited
to
eat
the
circlet
of
delicate
pastry
upon
it
.
Vain
favour
!
coming
,
like
most
other
favours
long
deferred
and
often
wished
for
,
too
late
!
I
could
not
eat
the
tart
;
and
the
plumage
of
the
bird
,
the
tints
of
the
flowers
,
seemed
strangely
faded
:
I
put
both
plate
and
tart
away
.
Bessie
asked
if
I
would
have
a
book
:
the
word
book
acted
as
a
transient
stimulus
,
and
I
begged
her
to
fetch
Gulliver
's
Travels
from
the
library
.
This
book
I
had
again
and
again
perused
with
delight
.
I
considered
it
a
narrative
of
facts
,
and
discovered
in
it
a
vein
of
interest
deeper
than
what
I
found
in
fairy
tales
:
for
as
to
the
elves
,
having
sought
them
in
vain
among
foxglove
leaves
and
bells
,
under
mushrooms
and
beneath
the
ground-ivy
mantling
old
wall-nooks
,
I
had
at
length
made
up
my
mind
to
the
sad
truth
,
that
they
were
all
gone
out
of
England
to
some
savage
country
where
the
woods
were
wilder
and
thicker
,
and
the
population
more
scant
;
whereas
,
Lilliput
and
Brobdignag
being
,
in
my
creed
,
solid
parts
of
the
earth
's
surface
,
I
doubted
not
that
I
might
one
day
,
by
taking
a
long
voyage
,
see
with
my
own
eyes
the
little
fields
,
houses
,
and
trees
,
the
diminutive
people
,
the
tiny
cows
,
sheep
,
and
birds
of
the
one
realm
;
and
the
corn-fields
forest-high
,
the
mighty
mastiffs
,
the
monster
cats
,
the
tower-like
men
and
women
,
of
the
other
.
117
Yet
,
when
this
cherished
volume
was
now
placed
in
my
hand
--
when
I
turned
over
its
leaves
,
and
sought
in
its
marvellous
pictures
the
charm
I
had
,
till
now
,
never
failed
to
find
--
all
was
eerie
and
dreary
;
the
giants
were
gaunt
goblins
,
the
pigmies
malevolent
and
fearful
imps
,
Gulliver
a
most
desolate
wanderer
in
most
dread
and
dangerous
regions
.
I
closed
the
book
,
which
I
dared
no
longer
peruse
,
and
put
it
on
the
table
,
beside
the
untasted
tart
.
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118
Bessie
had
now
finished
dusting
and
tidying
the
room
,
and
having
washed
her
hands
,
she
opened
a
certain
little
drawer
,
full
of
splendid
shreds
of
silk
and
satin
,
and
began
making
a
new
bonnet
for
Georgiana
's
doll
.
Meantime
she
sang
:
her
song
was
--
119
"
In
the
days
when
we
went
gipsying
,
120
A
long
time
ago
.
"