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"
I
m
afraid
I
don
t
have
much
time
,
"
she
said
absently
.
"
As
I
told
you
on
the
phone
,
Laurens
has
asked
me
to
come
to
New
York
immediately
.
I
was
actually
on
my
way
out
when
you
called
.
"
I
said
nothing
,
waiting
,
and
when
she
had
finished
pouring
I
got
my
own
glass
.
The
move
felt
bone
-
deep
wrong
,
and
my
awkwardness
must
have
shown
.
She
started
with
realisation
.
"
Oh
,
I
"
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"
Forget
it
.
"
I
settled
back
into
my
seat
and
sipped
at
the
drink
.
It
had
a
faint
bite
beneath
the
mellowness
.
"
You
wanted
to
know
how
we
decided
?
We
gambled
.
Paper
,
scissors
,
stone
.
Of
course
,
we
talked
around
it
for
hours
first
.
They
had
us
in
a
virtual
forum
over
in
New
York
,
very
high
ratio
,
discretion
-
shielded
while
we
made
up
our
minds
.
No
expense
spared
for
the
heroes
of
the
hour
.
"
I
found
an
edge
of
bitterness
creeping
into
my
voice
,
and
I
had
to
stop
to
dump
it
.
I
took
a
longer
pull
at
my
drink
.
"
Like
I
said
,
we
talked
.
A
lot
.
We
thought
of
a
lot
of
different
ways
to
decide
,
some
of
them
were
maybe
even
viable
,
but
in
the
end
we
kept
coming
back
to
it
.
Scissors
,
paper
,
stone
.
Best
of
five
.
Why
not
?
"
I
shrugged
,
but
it
was
not
the
casual
gesture
I
hoped
it
would
appear
.
I
was
still
trying
to
shake
off
the
cold
that
crept
through
me
whenever
I
thought
about
that
game
,
trying
to
second
-
guess
myself
with
my
own
existence
at
stake
.
The
best
of
five
,
and
it
had
gone
to
two
all
.
My
heart
was
beating
like
the
junk
rhythm
in
Jerry
s
Closed
Quarters
,
and
I
was
dizzy
with
adrenalin
.
Even
facing
Kawahara
hadn
t
been
this
hard
.
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When
he
lost
the
last
round
stone
to
my
paper
we
both
stared
at
our
two
extended
hands
for
what
seemed
like
a
long
time
.
Then
,
he
d
got
up
with
a
faint
smile
and
cocked
his
thumb
and
forefinger
at
his
own
head
,
somewhere
midway
between
a
salute
and
a
burlesque
of
suicide
.
"
Anything
I
should
tell
Jimmy
when
I
see
him
?
"
I
shook
my
head
wordlessly
.