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I
turned
away
again
,
numb
to
a
degree
I
hadn
’
t
felt
since
the
smoking
ruins
of
Innenin
.
Vaguely
,
I
felt
Trepp
clap
me
on
the
shoulder
.
"
Come
on
,
"
she
said
companionably
.
"
Let
’
s
get
out
of
here
.
"
I
followed
her
out
under
the
soul
-
bruising
architecture
,
beneath
the
sneering
smiles
of
the
hooded
guardians
,
and
I
knew
that
from
among
her
grey
-
wombed
clones
,
Kawahara
was
watching
me
all
the
way
with
a
similar
smile
.
It
seemed
to
take
forever
to
leave
the
hall
and
when
the
huge
steel
portals
cracked
open
to
reveal
the
outside
world
,
the
light
that
spilled
inward
was
an
infusion
of
life
that
I
grabbed
at
like
a
drowning
man
.
All
at
once
,
the
basilica
was
a
vertical
,
a
cold
depth
of
ocean
out
of
which
I
was
reaching
for
the
sun
on
the
rippled
surface
.
As
we
left
the
shadows
,
my
body
sucked
up
the
warmth
on
offer
as
if
it
were
a
solid
sustenance
Very
gradually
,
the
shivering
began
to
leave
me
.
But
as
I
walked
away
,
beneath
the
brooding
power
of
the
cross
,
I
could
still
feel
the
presence
of
the
place
like
a
cold
hand
on
the
nape
of
my
neck
.
That
night
was
a
blur
.
Later
,
when
I
tried
to
get
it
back
,
even
Envoy
recall
would
only
give
me
fragments
.
Trepp
wanted
a
night
on
the
town
.
The
best
nightlife
in
Europe
,
she
maintained
,
was
only
minutes
away
,
and
she
had
all
the
right
addresses
.
I
wanted
my
thought
processes
stopped
dead
in
their
tracks
.
We
started
in
a
hotel
room
on
a
street
I
could
not
pronounce
.
Some
tetrameth
analogue
fired
through
the
whites
of
our
eyes
by
needlespray
.
I
sat
passively
in
a
chair
by
the
window
and
let
Trepp
shoot
me
up
,
trying
to
not
think
about
Sarah
and
the
room
in
Millsport
.
Trying
not
to
think
at
all
.
Two
-
tone
holographies
outside
the
window
cast
Trepp
’
s
concentrated
features
in
shades
of
red
and
bronze
,
a
demon
in
the
act
of
sealing
the
pact
.
I
felt
the
insidious
tilt
at
the
corners
of
perception
as
the
tetrameth
went
barrelling
along
my
synapses
,
and
when
it
was
my
turn
to
do
Trepp
I
almost
got
lost
in
the
geometries
of
her
face
.
This
was
very
good
stuff
…
There
were
murals
of
the
Christian
hell
,
flames
leaping
like
clawed
fingers
over
a
procession
of
screaming
,
naked
sinners
.
At
one
end
of
the
room
,
where
the
figures
on
the
walls
seemed
to
blend
with
the
denizens
of
the
bar
in
smoke
and
noise
,
a
girl
danced
on
a
rotating
platform
.
A
cupped
petal
of
black
glass
scythed
around
with
the
platform
and
each
time
it
passed
between
audience
and
dancer
,
the
girl
was
gone
and
a
skeleton
danced
grinning
in
her
place
.